Page 76

Maybe it was a faulty flak jacket. Maybe it was just plain bad luck. In any event, I’ll never forget the incomprehension in his eyes as my fellow warrior looked down and saw his own organs spilling onto the cold rocks beneath him.

War is hell.

I avenged his death. That Scorp was the first of countless more I’d kill during my hundred years of service.

But while I avenged his death – I couldn’t save his life.

That night, when we’d all returned to our Reavers, covered in blood and bruises, we turned on the auto-pilot and drank ourselves into a stupor.

Then, we’d fought – us brothers in arms. We fresh-faced Aurelian recruits screamed at each other. We yelled. We punched each other with feral brutality, until the pain of our comrades’ fists was enough to cloud our thoughts of fear, and sorrow.

“Training.”

That’s what you call it – the fighting and brawling among recruits.

We call it training. We conduct it in sand-strewn arenas, and while wearing workout gear, all to save face.

But the truth is: We new recruitsneededthe pain of fighting among ourselves to block out our rancid fear, and the horrible memories of the fate our brothers had faced as they’d died by our sides.

In some ways, the fighting we’d done on the Reaver, that first night, was as much responsible for forging the Bond between Hadrian, Kitos and I as battling the Scorp had been.

We three had brawled together. Fought, and punched, and yelled. Fighting – even among ourselves – kept us sharp, and we sharpened our iron well that first night.

We drank, too. Drink dulls your senses, and together my battle brothers and I had hoped the combination would give us dreamless sleep.

Instead, we were all haunted that night by the whimpers and screams of the men who’d died all around us.

I drag myself out from my dark thoughts. Instead, I look at the bright hope, sitting in the medical chair in front of me.

No – I don’t want to make Allie suffer any pain, but if she needs it, she needs it.

She’s a strong woman – and I can’t take the choice of sedation away from her.

“AI – proceed.”

The steel tentacles of the med-bay chair extend. One of the probing, steel arms moves to Allie’s right forearm. A sudden beam of bright, fiery laser shoots out and scorches the flesh of her arm.

The metal restraints curled around Allie’s arms and legs keep her perfectly in place – but I can still feel her agony through the Bond. Allie hisses out in pain, gasping for relief; but she wears her agony with the resilience of an Aurelian.

More than that – the grief in her Aura fades as the pain floods her body. I know what she’s doing. Sometimes the physical pain is nothing compared to emotional distress. Sometimes, it can even help drown out the more painful emotions.

Her pain floods through the Bond, and I feel it as though it’s my own. My rage builds. Ihateto see innocents suffering. I never want to see my mate in pain like this again.

“Do you need me to stop it?” I ask her through gritted teeth. “Do you need sedation?”

Tears are streaming from Allie’s eyes as the surgical laser tortures her, burning deep within her skin. But beneath the tears, her eyes flash defiantly.

“Fuck, no,” she hisses. “I can handle it… I canfuckinghandle it.” She snarls, and I realize I’ve never seen someone so strong in all my life.

Concern and shock suddenly pour through the Bond – this time from my triad.

“Everything is under control,”I telepath.“Our mate is not in danger.”I know I have to respond – to keep them from leaving their posts and running to Allie’s aid.

Allie could have taken sedation. She could have taken an injection to numb the pain of this procedure. Instead, she bears down on it, clenching her jaw – crushing the pain with her iron will, before the pain can crush her.

It hurts me to watch, but I force myself to. I force myself to feel every ounce of pain being broadcast through our shared telepathic Bond. If I am to be linked to Allie for the rest of my life, Ineedto be able to handle when she’s in pain. Life is not all beauty and goodness. I will try and ensure she never experiences pain, but if there are times she suffers, she needs me to be clear-headed through them.

I clench my fist…