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I brushed my hand across my eyes, pulling at my lids, hoping to dash the tears before they could overflow. Setting my sights on the throngs of tourists, I went to follow Javi, but a rough grip gently caught my arm. I didn’t make it past the building’s edge.

“Come on, River.” Ryder skimmed his fingers along my shoulder. The spark had faded from his touch. “It’s a lost cause.”

Turning to face him, I snarled, “That lost cause happens to be my friend.”

“That’s not what I meant.” His palms rubbed my biceps in long, soothing strokes. “Look, you’re not going to get through to him tonight. Chasing after him might make things worse. He’s obviously upset and you’re…” What, a hot emotional mess? He trailed off at whatever face I made. “Let him cool down for a bit. You both should.”

I let out a sigh, ragged from being on the cusp of bawling, and scooted away from his touch. The last thing I needed was for Javi to come back and see me being comforted by him. Though in my heart, I knew he was gone.

As much as it had killed me to watch him slump away, I’d let him for a reason: I didn’t know what was happening to me, but it involved dangerous things—things capable of shredding a body in one swipe or maddening a mind irrevocably. How could I expose him to that?

I couldn’t, not until I got a handle on things. Doing so after an argument over “Neo from The Matrix” wouldn’t help my credibility—not in the slightest.

Shaking my head, I snatched Javi’s gift off the ground and trudged to the parking lot, my eyes fixed on my own two feet. Ryder didn’t try to reach for me, he didn’t even walk next to me. He must’ve gotten the hint and stayed a few paces behind me.

The comic book crinkled under my arms, locked and crossed over my chest. A brush of skittish energy pulsed in tandem with my heartbeat. There was another reason why this was so hard for Javi—one involving feelings I’d tried so hard not to acknowledge because love had the capacity to kill us just as much as it could save us.

I stepped onto the train track that ran parallel to the park, balancing my footwork and the echo of Javi’s laughter as his memory screamed the floor is lava! That alone made my eyeballs burn. Hopping down, I blinked the tears away, knowing they’d flow freely once I hit my pillow.

As we approached the glossy black truck, Ryder caught me off guard when he opened my door before his. Faltering slightly at the unexpected chivalry, I slid onto the bench. My phone lay on the floorboard’s carpet, connected to the USB. With the turn of the ignition the screen glowed to life, and in came the dreaded Dad texts. Since it was now after midnight, I prepared myself for a decade of scolding, but a “phew” slipped between my lips.

Ryder raised his eyebrows.

“My dad’s faculty dinner is running late.” Really late. Like drinks until two AM kind of late. Ryder’s expression remained unchanged, so I added, “He’s not home. Or I would be screwed.” He nodded at that, a mutual understanding. His brother, or in his words, the only father figure he had, must be the same way.

An acoustic track riffed from the stereo, calming my restless nerves. My gaze flicked to Ryder mouthing the lyrics, tapping his fingers to the song. Despite the warmth blasting from the air vents, goosebumps broke out along my arms as if the singer plucked my skin instead of the guitar strings.

I was sitting next to an angel. Well, part angel. But in this moment, as he drove me home in his old Chevrolet pickup, Ryder couldn’t have looked more mortal. He didn’t have wings, and while the gold flecks in his green stare ignited something dangerous and molten in me, he didn’t have actual fire in his eyes. Then again, neither did I, and based on what he’d told me I was also part angel. Nephilim, apparently.

Why would my dad—why would the Voices—hide that from me? Like, what was the point? Sure, the concept was a little jarring, but to keep me in the dark to just have me find out, on accident, eighteen years later and have my view of the world totally upended? I had a really hard time believing everyone was as oblivious as me. Someone had to have known.

My head drifted backwards, my lids growing heavy. It’s not like I would’ve listened anyway.

In what felt like the blink of an eye, we arrived at my house. How did he know where I lived? I must’ve…told him or something. Regardless, I was home, and I was spent. He slowed to my curb. I squeaked out goodnight before I could even debate staying in the car, slinking to the middle seat, and thanking him for the ride in a way that seemed completely inappropriate for what had just happened with Javi. A chill greeted me as I stepped out of his car and dragged my feet to the door.

Halfway to the porch intuition drop-kicked my stomach. I stopped in my tracks. Kissing may have been off the table, but this didn’t feel like the right ending for tonight. Doubling down on destiny, I strode back to the truck.

“Hey.” Resting my elbows on the base of the open window, I took a deep breath. “I get out of class at two tomorrow. I have therapy after, but do you want to…” I still had a second to reconsider, but I was done thinking, and he was the only Nephilim I knew. The words jumped out of my mouth: “Hang-out-when-I’m-done?”

“Yeah.” His reply came quick, cushioned by a smile that made his mouth dimple and raised the two beauty marks on his cheeks. “I can pick you up from school and take you.”

“Okay. Cool.” I stood there, not sure what I was waiting for, the corners of my lips lifting in response. “Can you leave the demons at home this time?”

I took his smirk as a yes, but I wasn’t quite sure I believed him.

Chapter 20

Sure enough, when the clock struck twelve, my chariot awaited. My gut tumbled at the sight of Ryder’s truck sitting in line with the rest of the cars in the five-minute curbside pickup.

As I approached the passenger door, he lowered his chin, peering at me over round, metal-framed Ray-Bans. “Miss me?”

With my cheeks flushed from the dash across campus, you’d think I did. I rolled my eyes, my attention snagging on a box that had an image of an object in the shape of a semicircle with padded ends on top, sitting next to him on the leather cushion.

I stopped reaching for the handle. My heart skipped a beat.

“W-what’s that?” I stammered. I fully knew what it was.

Ryder dipped his head back and let out a deep, carefree laugh. “It’s not going to bite you, River. Get in and see.” He winked and flashed a full smile that was equal parts rare and reckless.