Page 63
Story: A Very Miller-Cooper Life
Carter nodded again. “I’m trying my best to believe that, but it’s hard.”
“I know that, dear.” My mom ran her hand up and down Carter’s arm. “But trust me, there are plenty of other girls out there who would feel so very lucky to be with you. I have no doubt about that.”
A fog came over me as soon as I heard my mom say the word girls. Even after all this time, she barely acknowledged the fact that I loved women and I had been happily married to one for almost twenty-six years. I just barely made out my mom greeting Reagan, then telling everyone to head inside to see my dad.
“Are you okay, Charlotte?” my mom asked when I stayed rooted in place.
The fog slowly drifted away and after a few seconds, I finally felt like I could speak again. “Thank you for saying that.”
“For saying what?” My mom tilted her head as she studied my face as if it held all the answers.
“That there were plenty of girls that would feel lucky to be with Carter.”
“Oh. Psh.” My mom waved her hand nonchalantly as if this wasn’t a huge moment. “It’s true. Wouldn’t you agree?”
“Of course I agree. It’s just, you said girls. You never said anything inappropriate about Carter being with Marcie, but I don’t know. I kind of thought…”
I let my voice trail off because I wasn’t sure how to put my thoughts into words.
Luckily, my mom understood. “That I would hope this break-up meant she wasn’t gay anymore?” My mom chuckled and shook her head. “I’m sure a few years ago that would’ve been the case, but losing your aunt last year really changed things for me. My prejudices kept me from her for so many years, and now that she’s gone, I realized I can never get that time back. Just like I can’t take back everything I put you and James through.” Her lip quivered, and I worried she might start to cry. “For what it’s worth, I am sorry. I’m so very sorry, Charlotte.”
I couldn’t take it anymore. Between Carter’s broken heart and the apology from my mom, my emotions were being pulled in every direction. I had no idea how to express how I was feeling, so instead, I broke into tears.
My mom wrapped me in a hug. “Oh, sweetie, please don’t be sad. I don’t think my heart can handle both Carter and you being upset.”
I shook my head, then tried to wipe my tears away, but it was impossible when they kept coming. “I’m not sad. Well, I mean, I’m sad that Carter is going through this, but that’s not what my tears are about. At least, not completely. I just honestly never thought I’d hear you say those words, and it means more to me than you’ll ever know.”
My mom put her arm around me. “I know it’s too little too late, but I promise to do better with whatever time I have left.”
As my heart practically beat out of my chest, I thought it might explode. My mom was saying all of the things I wished she had said for years, and while I wished it hadn’t taken so long, that didn’t matter right now. All that mattered was that for the first time in my life, I actually felt like my mom fully accepted mefor the person I was. I knew I wasn’t the only person who needed to hear this though. “You need to say all of this to Jamie, too.”
My mom’s eyes fell to the ground as she nodded. “You’re right. I will. I promise.” She lifted her chin up and smiled at me. “Now, what do you say we make that little girl of ours smile?”
I couldn’t stop my own smile from spreading across my face. “That sounds perfect.”
***
The day really was perfect. Reagan called Jamie and he and Ethan came over to our parents’ house. Unfortunately, Finn was on a trip so he couldn’t make it, but the rest of us, including Carter, had a great time. Later that night, while my dad and Ethan grilled and my mom baked, the triplets, Reagan, and Jamie went for a swim in the lake.
I smiled as I watched all five of them splash around as if they were kids again. For the first time in maybe forever this place actually felt like home to me.
When my dad walked up to me and put an arm around my shoulder, I leaned into him. “Your mom told me that you two had a bit of a moment earlier,” he said as he stared out at the lake with me.
“We did. It was nice.”
“I know things have been much better between us than they were with your mom, but I hope you know that I’m sorry, too. Not only for how I acted, but for how I allowed her to act. It should’ve never happened. I’ve learned a lot about being a parent by watching you and Jamie and your significant others. You’re everything I wish I would have been.”
I squeezed my eyes shut to try to keep myself from crying. This weekend had been way too emotional already. “Thanks, Daddy. That means so much coming from you.”
My dad cleared his throat and removed his arm from around my shoulder. “Now, if you don’t mind, I’m going to go back to the grill and act like I’m not on the verge of tears.”
“Roger that.”
As soon as my dad walked away, Ronan jumped out of the lake and ran over to me, not hesitating before wrapping me in a big, wet hug. “You looked a little too dry,” he said with a laugh.
I shivered as a light breeze hit me. “Yeah. Thanks for that.”
Ronan bounced from foot to foot then leaned close to me as if he was going to tell me a secret. “So, I didn’t want to say anything in front of Carter because of what she’s going through, but I can’t hold it in anymore. I’m going to start shopping for rings. I probably won’t propose for at least another year, and I don’t see the wedding happening anytime soon, but I am going to ask Mallory to marry me.”
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