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ELI

“How do you feel?” Eli whispered.

The sun was beginning to come up. The two of them had been up all night. Eli had believed, at first, that they were only going to satisfy their desire for one another quickly, and that they would move on, like finally scratching an itch after resisting for a long time. But it had turned into a very long night, a night during which neither of them had slept a wink. Eli already knew that he was going to have to reach out to his office and let them know not to expect him in today. Thank goodness he had begun to set the expectation that such a thing would happen from time to time — even a few weeks ago, he knew, he wouldn’t have been able to manage it.

“I feel amazing,” Maddie said. She was lying on her back and staring at the ceiling, where the fan spun in lazy circles. “I can’t believe this happened.”

“I’ve thought about it for a long time,” Eli admitted.

“So have I.”

“Have you really?”

She looked over at him, a small smile on her face. “Did you think this only happened because you made me a ballet studio?” she asked. “I love the studio, but I wouldn’t have gone this far for it.”

“I had no idea you felt the same way I did.”

“I’ve been feeling things for a long time,” Maddie said, looking over at him. “I thought you knew. I thought you must be able to tell.”

“I couldn’t.”

“I hid it better than I thought I did.” She sighed. “I told myself I had to. That nothing could ever happen between us.”

“I know. I’ve been telling myself the same thing.”

“So what changed?”

“I couldn’t hold back anymore. I got tired of trying. I think we must be restraining ourselves for the same reasons, right? Trying to protect Charlie?”

Maddie nodded. “I’d never want to do anything to put his feelings at risk.”

“No. I wouldn’t either. But you’ve been such an undeniable force for good in his life that it’s hard for me to believe anything bad could come of this,” Eli said. “Maybe I’m being too permissive with myself, but… I’m ready to take the risk.”

“I can’t believe I’m hearing you say this.” Maddie shook her head. “Tess is never going to believe any of this.”

Eli couldn’t keep a smile off his face. “You’ve talked to Tess about me?”

“We talk about you every time we get together,” she confessed.

“What do you say?”

“Well, she told me that if I had any sense, I would keep away from you,” Maddie said. “And I told her — over and over — that there was nothing to worry about. That nothing would ever happen between the two of us.”

“I guess Tess saw the situation more clearly than either of us did.”

“She usually does,” Maddie agreed. “When I tell her that this happened, she’s going to be full ofI told you so.”

“And then what? Do you think she’ll disapprove?”

“She’ll want to know what happened between us next. How we followed it up in the aftermath.”

“What will you tell her?”

“I don’t know, do I? That part hasn’t happened yet.”

“Well, I’d better work on making the best impression I can.” Eli got out of bed and pulled on his flannel pajama pants.

“Where are you going?” Maddie asked him.