Page 65

Charlise

“That’s seven for me. I need to slow down or I’ll be passed out in the sand.” I usually don’t drink like this but Zayne has me in my head big time tonight. Nicole was happy to help distract me. Bryce is here somewhere but I’ve been avoiding him. It’s not like I owe him any explanation as to why us talking anymore would be a bad idea but I thought I would go ahead and have the conversation with him. Even if nothing becomes official with Zayne, I know I won’t be capable of being present with anyone outside of Zayne. My thoughts have been consumed by him for far too long and now that he’s back, it’s gotten worse.

“I should just go get this out of the way.” Nicole nods her head and hands me another solo cup filled with the fruity drink I’ve been drinking.

Bryce is sitting near the fire with a small group of people. When I get close, he moves so that there’s space for me to sit beside him. He tucks me against his body with an arm over my shoulder and a quick kiss to my temple. His demeanor is calm and collected and he makes me feel the same. As I sit and stare into the fire, I realize I’m completely absent of the intense chaos that Zayne resonates and creates inside me. That should be a good thing but I’ve felt the mess of us for so long, it feels lonely when it’s not there.

“I need to tell you… I have a situation.” I stop talking because I don’t really know what to call this thing I have with Zayne.

“Okay. We’ve never claimed to be exclusive.”

“I know.”

“Do what makes you happy.” He squeezes me a little tighter, reassuring me and the stupid weight I was feeling earlier fades away. I’m not even sure why I felt the need to break things off with him. I guess it’s a loose end that I have out there, not to mention I’d hate for Bryce to see me somewhere and talk to me with Zayne around. He is probably serious about making him disappear.

I lift my arms to hug him, but before I can do that, I’m somehow plowed into and scooped up at the same time. Zayne has me draped over his shoulder, bouncing with each step he takes. “Hope you said your goodbyes because I’m done being tested with the boy toy.”

“He’s not my boy toy.” I’m too drunk to be upside down and I’m definitely too drunk to have a shoulder wedged into my stomach. “Zayne put me down. I’m going to throw up.”

“Not a chance. I’ll put you down when we’re off of this fucking beach.” Zayne is the opposite of calm and this just proves my point. Outside of a miracle, I’m not sure how I made it to the car without hurling all over his back.

He slides me down his body and holds me in place because it’s clear that I’m in no position to stand still after that shake up.

“I told him we were…” I stop again because I don’t know what we are.

“We were what?”

“That’s it. I don’t know what we are. I said we’re a situation because for the life of me I can’t think of a better freaking word.”

“I can’t either. Did you tell him you’re done seeing him?”

“Yes.”

“Good. Now get in the car.”

“You could ask.” He picks me up, opens the door and puts me in the back seat of the car then goes around to the other side and sits in the seat beside me. I catch Theo’s smile through the rearview mirror when Zayne reaches over me to pull the seat belt out for me to put on. “Zayne.”

“Charli.” He mocks me, daring me to start the fight I’m about to. I decide I don’t have the energy to start this with both Zayne and my brother in the car.

“I’m not dealing with you tonight.”

“That’s funny.” My brother chimes in.

“What is?”

“The fact that you think you have a choice.” Zayne answers for him.

“Can we not right now?” I glare at Zayne telling him to stop, hoping he realizes we need to have our talk without anyone else around… especially my brother.

He reaches for my hand and intertwines his fingers with mine. There’s just enough streetlight shining through the windows for me to see Zayne looking over at me when Theo begins to drive.

Zayne rubs his thumb in a circle against the side of my hand, calming some of the crazy swirling around in my head. I lean against him and he moves our joined hands so that he’s got his arm around me and we’re still interlocked. It’s easy to rest my head on his chest and let my eyes fall heavy before we get there. When Zayne starts to move, I open my eyes and see that we’re not at the cabin. We’re at a house.

“Where are we?”

“Our place.”

“What do you mean, our place?” I must be half out of it because he’s not making any sense.

“I mean, I bought a place and I’m making it ours.”

“How long have you had this?” I’m frozen in place trying to comprehend what Zayne is saying.

“I just bought it before I moved back. It still needs furniture… but there’s a bed. I’ve been waiting for you to pick out the rest.”

I’m stunned silent. How can he go from ghosting me for years and then come back and tell me he bought us a house as if we’ve never been a part. My brother drives away as soon as Zayne and I are both out of the car.

“You can take your time. Don’t overthink it right now. I just wanted you to myself tonight and the cabin is too busy for what I have planned.” He gestures toward the house. “This will just be one of many steps in our future. It doesn’t have to be the first step.”

“Zayne. There’s just so much…” He pulls me into a hug, his arms wrapped tightly around me and mine falling into place around his back.

“I know… but we have forever to figure it out. I want you in my life, Charli. It’s always been you.” Tears fill my eyes while he whispers against my ear. “I don’t ever want to go without you again and it won’t always be easy but I can promise you will always be the one I search for in a room full of people. You’ll always be the one I crave in my bed, in my arms and on my dick. I want to go to sleep with you every night and wake up next to you naked and wrapped up in the sheets with me.” I let the thump of his heart racing keep me grounded against his chest and let him share everything he wants to say. So often we stop communicating because it’s easier to have sex than it is to open up about true feelings.

“I want you to walk beside me in life. I’m President of the club now and I want you involved in that part too. Of course, I would die to protect you and will do what has to be done to keep you safe.” I kiss his shirt where his heart beats and work to collect my thoughts while they fly at me at warp speeds.

“The club tested me tonight. I had a choice to save half the club or come to the bonfire to get you away from a guy that they claimed was in town from a different MC. One that hadn’t done anything yet but could potentially be a problem. I chose the club after I thought about everything, knowing they were in immediate danger. When we got there, I found out it was a setup from my father. I’m not sure in every scenario that I’d do the same, so I’ll need you to cooperate at all times. We have to communicate and I’ll always have you tracked.”

“It goes both ways.”

“We’ll work on that.”

“My dad is dying. He has less than two months.” I lift my head off of his chest and look up at him.

“I’m sorry.” He lowers his lips to my forehead and presses a long kiss, no doubt taking a moment before he says anything else.

“Me too. He’s always been around. Not the greatest dad… but I always knew he’d be there if I truly needed him. It’s going to be different with him gone.”

“Everything is going to be different. Some of it excites me and the rest of it terrifies me.” I don’t know how else to explain what I’m thinking. He seems to understand because he’s nodding as I talk. “I’m excited to start over with you but I’m terrified of what you could do to me.”

“I will work forever to make you trust me again.” He palms both of my cheeks and looks me right in the eyes as he says it. He keeps us both in the same position as I continue.

“I’m excited that you’re back but I’m terrified that the club will change you.”

“The club has already changed me.” I swallow at his confession.

“I’m excited that you want me beside you but I’m terrified that you’ll never actually let me in.”

“All of these are very fair concerns. I can only promise that I’ll share everything I can with you. You’ll have to trust that I know the line that shouldn’t be crossed.”

“What can you tell me about the past four years?” I decide to ask the question again, hoping he will finally share some of what he went through so I can stop imagining the possibilities.

“The night I left was the first time I had to kill a man. I’ve been working for the club, taking care of unfinished business and proving my loyalty. I’ve done some fucked up shit and I may have to do even more if the time comes. The best part of stepping into my father’s role is I can order shit done instead of doing it myself.” Even I know, the club tends to protect the President. I would expect that same treatment for Zayne. “Can you handle the man I’ve become?”

“I can handle it if I don’t know the details. I’ll just imagine they’re all bad guys and trust you to make good decisions for the club and our family.”

“Our family. I like the sound of that.” He leans in to kiss me on the lips and this time it’s slow and sensual, a contrast to the rushed and craved kisses we shared earlier today. He finally takes his hand in mine and begins to lead me into the house.

“Theo will be my Vice.” I’m not sure that makes me feel any safer about anything but at least I can trust my brother and Zayne to have each other’s backs. They have for as long as I’ve known them.

He opens the front door to a completely bare house. There’s nothing on the walls and not a single chair to sit in. I spin around to take it all in and start to let myself see the potential here. “Our bedroom is this way.” He pulls me in the direction of the bedroom down at the end of the hallway. Once we walk through the door, it’s like we’ve walked into a different universe. The bedroom is fully decorated and the giant bed is covered with pillows and a cozy looking comforter. There’s a walk-in closet that has about ten shirts and a few pairs of jeans hanging in it, taking up maybe ten percent of one side. Curtains touch the ground at each window and the art on the wall could be straight out of an art museum. “I love it.”

“I was hoping you’d like it but change anything you want. The only thing I want to make sure is in here… is you. The rest can go.” This time I initiate the kiss and before I have the chance to try and lift myself around his waist to deepen it, he is lifting me to my spot. This feels like home. Not the house he bought… but being wrapped up in his arms.