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I open the door expecting to see the doorman with a package of something I forgot I’d ordered, and instead find Carter wearing a trembling smile.

He holds up a box with the MP logo between us.

“I come bearing gifts,” he says, and sounds... cheerful. This is the way he sounded last week after he hung out with all his friends. At least I think that’s it. Maybe he’s in a good mood because he did spend yesterday evening with his friends?

His smile as he looks at me tells me he’s happy to be here in front of me, though.

I didn’t expect that.

Considering our last interaction, I expected a lot more... emotions. Bad emotions to be precise.

I thought some time apart, maybe a day or two by myself would be enough so I could get back to focusing on starting a relationship with him, but spending hours upon hours staring helplessly at the ceiling didn’t help at all.

The worst part is that ESoothe and its uncertain future was only in my thoughts for a fraction of that time.

Mostly I thought about Carter.

I thought about how I would go to his place on Monday and explain...

That’s as far as I got. I still have no idea how to explain what happened yesterday, or how I could’ve done things differently, said things differently so he’d understand my motivation to leave.

I reach for the box slowly, and I know it’s cinnamon rolls as soon as that mouthwatering smell reaches me.

“Thank you,” I murmur slowly. I know this is the right thing to say when someone gives you a gift, so that’s easy, but now I don’t know what else to say.

Should I invite him in?

Does he even want to come in?

What if his cheerfulness is only because he came here to break up and get rid of me?

Are the cinnamon rolls to soften the blow?

“Wha—” I was about to ask him directly what he wanted but he cuts me off.

“I’m here to ask you again if you want my company?

” he declares, squaring his shoulders and standing taller.

“I want to assure you that if you say no, I will accept your wishes, but I also want to clarify that whatever you need to do or say to work through the incredible disappointment of not getting the investor you wanted will not change my mind about you. Whatever happens while you’re dealing with this won’t change my feelings for you, and I want to be here for you and support you. ”

I mull over his words for a moment.

Happiness and dread are both making my heartbeat quicken.

It has to be an incredible stroke of luck to have found Carter when I did. He’s understanding and patient and kind, but do I deserve it?

Is what he’s saying true?

Will he still want to be here when I blast dark and angry music all over my apartment for hours on end followed by hours of complete silence?

“For the sake of complete honesty,” he says before I can come up with any way to react.

“I should tell you I went up to your parents’ place first and talked to your mum.

I didn’t know that you hadn’t told her about Mrs. Blackwell, and I kind of blurted it out to her.

Also, I asked her if she thought me pushing today and asking again if you really wanted to be alone was a good idea.

She told me to come and ask again, so here I am. ”

Okay, there’s a lot more to unpack there.

Is it wrong that I’m relieved Carter was the one to tell Mom about the big failure?

I hope it’s not, because I was really dreading having to deal with her disappointment. And best of all, she’ll probably tell Dad, so I won’t have to say a word to him either.

Now, the fact that he asked her if it’s a good idea to ask me again does bring up mixed feelings in me.

On the one hand, it feels like I’m being treated like a child. Carter could’ve asked me .

On the other hand, I’m hardly qualified to tell Carter what to do or what I need. It took only three sips of coffee earlier to realize I have no clue what I need.

So maybe it can feel like I’m being treated like a child, but it can also feel like it’s necessary in this instance?

I don’t really feel like being mad at Carter for asking Mom, or at Mom for answering. Maybe when I do have the energy to add anger to my special cocktail of emotions, I’ll rant, but not today.

Today I... “I don’t want to be alone,” I admit, still staring at the box. I hear Carter’s short gasp, then it feels like my insides melt when he asks quietly.

“Do you want my company or someone else? I can get them for you.”

“No, I want it to be you,” I confess. Then I take a step back, leaving the door open for him. I hear him come in as I set down the box on the counter.

“Then let me just say this. I have the whole weekend off, and I even asked Sebas for Monday and Tuesday off too because I have a cool... date planned. If you don’t feel like going out, then we don’t have to leave at all, though.

I just thought it’d be a good idea to take your mind off everything.

But what’s most important is that I just want to be here with you.

So whatever you want to do...” He trails off, but I understand perfectly well what he’s saying.

I stay with my back to him for a moment longer, and wonder if it really is wise to let him see this part of me, but then I remember how special Carter is. If I want to... keep him, then he needs to see this side of me too. It wouldn’t be fair to him otherwise.

“ESoothe has been all I have for a very long time,” I start out slowly, and turn to see him looking at me with eyes wide open and his lips tilted with a small smile. “I’ve worked toward making it a reality for almost a decade, and now it’s possible that it’s all been for nothing.”

I take a deep breath and let it out harshly. Seems like a rant is what’s on the menu.

“Even worse than that possibility is the idea that I also just wasted years of my friends’ lives. Added to that, now I have you, and the idea that I might ruin things between us because I can’t deal with disappointment the way other people do is terrifying, Carter!”

My chest heaves with short breaths, and instead of telling me I’m acting insane, he walks over and takes my hands in his. His grip is too strong, but I don’t mind, it gives me something else to focus on.

“Why do you think that would ruin things between us, darling?” he asks softly.

“Because I’m not like other people,” I cry out.

“I’m aware,” he says, sounding annoyingly calm.

“I think I’m losing my mind,” I whisper.

“I’m pretty sure I got a dog yesterday, and I battled all day to keep my shit together.

Then when I came home alone it didn’t help.

Music helped a little, but all I could think about was you.

All I wanted was to lock myself in my bedroom, close the blinds until it was completely dark, and have loud music blaring through the apartment, then never come out again. But that didn’t help either. ”

“Okay,” Carter starts, and then looks around the apartment. “We’ll get to the thing about the dog later, but first just answer this. Can I be in that dark room with you?”

“What?” That seems preposterous.

“Would you still be able to find what you need in that room if I was in there with you?”

I take a long moment to think about it.

In the past there have been moments when I’ve needed that escape, and I’ve never wanted anyone else in there with me. But when I imagine it now, and Carter there with me, it doesn’t feel... bad.

So I nod.

“We can try and if it doesn’t work, no worries. I’ll just leave the room to you and be out here in case you need anything, all right?”

“That sounds awful.” I speak quickly. “You’d be out here doing nothing?”

“Well, no. I can entertain myself. It’s not your job to make sure I’m not bored.”

“And it shouldn’t be your job to babysit me,” I cry out.

“This isn’t babysitting, Liam.” The long breath he lets out sounds tired.

“Then what is it?” I demand.

“This is me taking care of you when you’re having a rough time.

From what I’ve learned about you, you’re more than capable of taking care of yourself and so am I.

But we all need a bit more help once in a while.

I’m sure that if someday I go through something as disappointing as what happened yesterday, you’ll be there to comfort me as well, right?

This isn’t an everyday occurrence, and it’s not going to define how our entire relationship dynamic is. It’s just these three or four days.”

“And you’d really be okay with that?” I challenge.

“I promise I am.” I can’t find any indicators that he’s annoyed. Is it possible? Or is he just acting this way to accomodate me?

“What if it happens again in a few months?”

“Then I’m sure I’ll still want to comfort you.”

He does sound sure, but I just don’t understand how he could be. This is bound to be a pain in the ass for him.

“All right, we can try,” I murmur.

“Thank you,” he whispers, then seems to brighten. His hands come up to cup my cheeks and he kisses me softly. It’s not a suggestive kind of kiss in any way, more like... comfort. Exactly as he said.

“I don’t know how to fix any of the issues with your business, Liam,” he murmurs. “And I’m sorry you feel like your world is crashing down. All I can do is be next to you while you get through this, because you will get through this.”

“How?” I demand, desperately hoping he might have the answer.

“By realizing you’re not alone. Not all of the weight is on you. You can share it with everyone who cares about you. And who knows...” He shrugs as he drops his hands and grips my shoulders, caressing them over my shirt. “Maybe the dog will help.”

I can’t stop the helpless snort that leaves me, and I have to shake my head at myself. I can’t say I regret asking Jimmy if he’d consider letting me adopt one of Sassy’s pups, but it was really so out of character for me. I have no idea what I was thinking.

“Thank you for being here,” I whisper.

“You can assume from now on that when you need me, I’ll be here, okay?

” I nod in answer and kiss him too. Just quickly, because as our lips part we both reach for a hug at the same time, so when he speaks again, I hear his perfect voice right by my ear.

“Great. Now, do you want to take the cinnamon rolls in with us, and maybe another coffee, or should we leave them out here?”

“Let’s take everything in,” I tell him, my face buried against the soft skin of his neck.

But neither one of us moves away for a few minutes, and I enjoy every second that I get to feel him against me like a steady wall I can count on.

Monday morning finds us in the same position we’ve been in most of the weekend, cuddling in my bed.

It didn’t surprise Carter when I managed to fall asleep three minutes after we finished our cinnamon rolls and he ordered me to rest my head on his shoulder and wrapped his whole body around me.

It surprised me, of course.

But it faded quickly after I woke up.

As promised, he didn’t complain once about being holed up in my bedroom with me all weekend, and he kept telling me it was a surprise when I asked about this cool date idea he had .

I don’t know if he built the suspense in hopes that it would make me want to go more, and I honestly don’t think he’s that manipulative—I think he really just wants to surprise me—but by yesterday afternoon I was ready to face the world.

I called my parents and talked to them a bit, then agreed to come over for breakfast today and to bring Carter—I did check with him, and he seemed surprised to be invited but agreed.

He asked if I felt like going out to get more sweets since we ran out yesterday morning, and though I was mildly resistant to the idea, I pushed myself, and I don’t regret it now that we’re standing in the elevator on our way up to my parents’ place.

“Yay, you brought Carter,” London cheers when we walk into the kitchen. She rushes over and hugs both of us at the same time.

Thankfully Carter moves the box away and saves it from being crushed by my sister.

Mom and Dad ask a few questions about the status with ESoothe and what will happen now before we sit down to eat, and when my brothers come in, they offer their support with pats on my shoulder, and Larson even hugs me briefly.

It’s nice.

Then it’s like any other family breakfast we’ve ever had. Carter fits in seamlessly, and tells them he’s taking me away for two days, and though I hope he’ll let a detail slip out, he tells them it’s a surprise and that we’re leaving right after this.

By the time breakfast is over, I’m desperate for a clue, and so I beg.

“Please give me one clue.” We’re walking down the block toward the Hudson and I have no idea where we’re going, but I have the duffel bag he packed for me in my hand.

“Okay, we’re driving one hour away, maybe more depending on traffic, and we’re going to stay overnight.”

I’d kinda guessed the overnight thing, but now I have to think about what’s one hour away that he thinks will be cool for me?