Page 32

Leo

The relief I feel at seeing Hannah, at having her back with me, is almost overwhelming as I sit up and pull her into my lap. She’s bawling now, the tears streaming down her cheeks as she sobs in my arms, her reaction breaking my heart.

I fucking hate that this is happening to us right now.

“Han, babe,” I say softly, my arms wrapping tight around her as I pull her close and she buries her face in my neck. “Shhh, it’s going to be okay, I promise.”

She shakes her head, still not saying anything as she continues to cry. I have no idea what to say, what words I can possibly say to make her feel better in this moment. So I do the only thing I can, I sit back on the couch and hold her as she cries in my arms.

Eventually she pulls back, sniffling as I brush my thumbs across her cheeks, wiping away the last of her tears before leaning in to press a soft kiss to her lips.

“You okay?” I ask, knowing it’s a ridiculous question.

Hannah shakes her head, finally lifting her eyes to mine and nearly breaking my heart all over again with the anguish that fills them. “I’m sorry,” she whispers, biting her bottom lip. “So sorry.”

I crush her to me again, her head tucked under my chin. “You don’t have to apologize, Hannah, I get it. I really do.”

She’s shaking her head again. “No, you don’t get it,” she sobs. “It was awful, Leo. Fucking awful.”

Easing her back, I cup her face in my hands, forcing her to look at me. “I do get it, babe,” I tell her. “Why do you think I don’t work with him? Why do you think I changed my last name?”

It’s the first time I’ve actually said these words out loud to anyone, not wanting to admit that as much as I love my dad, I could never work with him. I never wanted to skew anyone else’s view of him either, never bad mouthing him to anyone or listening to the gossip I’ve heard.

But obviously here, everything is different and maybe if I’d known he was her former boss, I would have been more honest from the start.

Hannah blinks at me, a couple more tears falling from her eyes that I brush away. “Why is your last name Marsh?” she asks.

I give her a small smile. “It’s my middle name,” I admit. “Legally, my last name is still Langston, but yeah, I use Marsh for work reasons. It should actually be Marshall.”

“Marshall?” she asks, confused.

Chuckling a little, I shake my head. “Yeah, my real middle name is Marshall. Remember I told you my mom named me after her favorite movie star?” I pause as Hannah nods. “Yeah well, my dad gave me the middle name after his favorite rapper.”

“What?” Hannah blurts out.

I roll my eyes, brushing my thumbs across her cheeks again. “Marshall Mathers, Eminem? My dad thinks he’s all gangster and shit.”

Hannah’s eyes widen a little as she shakes her head. “Wow, that’s not…not what I would have expected.”

“Yeah, it’s a bit ridiculous to be honest, but that’s my dad,” I add with a shrug.

Hannah nods, glancing away from me now. Needing to figure this out, to let her know that we can get through this, I tip her face up to mine, brushing a gentle kiss against her lips before whispering, “If we just talk to him, we can make things right. I promise it’s not as bad as you think.”

Hannah lets out a long breath, shaking her head before I’ve even finished speaking. “It’s not just bad, Leo, it’s humiliating!” she shouts. “He was awful to me and I…well, I wasn’t exactly diplomatic when I left either.”

I can’t help but laugh, remembering the story my dad told me, even as Hannah hits me with a hard look. “Babe, I know about the double bird and the fuck you,” I say, smiling. “And just for the record, I think it’s awesome. Word is your resignation is pretty legendary in his kitchen.”

Hannah groans. “All the more reason that this is never going to work,” she says.

“What?”

“This,” she repeats, moving her hand between us.

“What the hell are you talking about, Hannah?” I ask as a spike of fear lances through me. Her head falls and once again, I tip her face back so she’s looking at me. “Talk to me, babe,” I add softly.

She swallows hard, her eyes still filled with sadness as they search my face. “Think about it, Leo,” she whispers. “How could you and I possibly work together when your dad and I hate each other?”

“He doesn’t hate you,” I say, my heart pounding in my chest at just what she’s implying now. “We can talk to him. Tomorrow,” I add. “We can figure this out, Hannah, I promise.”

“And what,” she continues. “At Christmas or Thanksgiving, he and I just act like that whole me working for him, him being awful, and me quitting in an epic rage never happened?”

I suck in a deep breath, letting it out slowly as I seriously wonder if Hannah is legit thinking about ending things with me because of my dad. “I don’t know, okay,” I eventually admit. “But that’s why we have to talk to him.”

“He’s your dad, Leo,” she says, shaking her head again. “You love him, you’re never—”

“I love you too, Hannah,” I say, cutting her off. “I’m not giving you up, you know. Not giving up on us.”

Hannah’s eyes close as her body deflates a little. “Look, it’s late, you should probably go. We both have to work tomorrow.”

“I’m not fucking going anywhere,” I say, standing from the couch, holding her against me. “The sooner you understand that, the better. So yeah, we are gonna go to bed and tomorrow we’re going to make things right. Talk to my dad, so we can go back to doing what we do best.”

Hannah’s head falls against my shoulder, but she doesn’t say anything or acknowledge my words. But she also doesn’t ask me to leave again, which I take as a good sign as I walk us into her bedroom where we both wordlessly undress before crawling into bed.

I feel physically and emotionally exhausted as I pull her close, wrapping my arms around her as she rests her head on my shoulder.

“I love you,” I whisper, pressing a kiss to the top of her head.

She lets out a soft sigh and I expect her to just fall asleep, but instead, she moves so she’s hovering over me, her hand on my face and her lips against mine as she kisses me hungrily.

I kiss her back, desperate to reconnect with her, to prove that what we have is everything to me and there’s not a chance in hell I’m giving it up.

Hannah groans and I roll her beneath me, my hand tracing a path down her body to her knee, hitching it around my hip as I push into her, moaning at the reconnection, at how good it feels.

“Fuck, I’ve missed you,” I whisper, my lips against hers as start to move.

Hannah’s hands cup my face, her eyes open as she watches me, not saying anything, her stare focused and intense. And it’s in that moment that I realize what she’s doing.

I stop moving, resisting the urge to continue, even as she digs her heel into my ass. “Don’t,” I command, my eyes locked with hers.

“Leo, please,” she pleads, her hands tightening against my jaw.

I shake my head. “No,” I tell her. “You don’t get to do this.”

“Do what?” she breathes out, frustrated.

“Fuck me like it’s the last time,” I say, my jaw clenched.

“This isn’t goodbye, Hannah,” I tell her, before making the monumental effort of pulling out and rolling off her.

I flop onto the bed beside her, a huff falling from my mouth as I stare up at the ceiling.

I can literally feel the stink eye my dick is currently giving me at what I’ve just done.

“Leo, seriously?” she asks, a bite to her words. “Did you just stop having sex with me in the middle of having sex with me?”

“Yep,” I reply, still not looking at her.

“Why?”

I turn to face her, pissed that she is asking me this, that she seriously thinks I didn’t notice what the fuck was going on just then. “Because, Hannah,” I reply, my words measured. “I’m not doing this with you.”

“Doing what?”

My hand slams down on the mattress beside me before curling into a fist. “I’m not fucking my girlfriend like it’s the last time I’ve ever going to fuck her because she’s planning to walk away from this amazing thing we have going on right now!

” My words are loud in the silence of her bedroom and I swear just the idea that that’s what she was doing is enough to have my hard-on disappear in an instant.

“I wasn’t,” she eventually says, biting her bottom lip as she stares down at me.

“You sure about that?” I ask.

She nods, her eyes never leaving mine. “Yes, Leo, I’m sure.”

We stare at each other for a few minutes, neither of us saying anything as our eyes search each other, desperate to know what each of us is thinking. Eventually, Hannah falls back onto the bed so she’s lying beside me, a foot of space between us as she stares up at the ceiling.

I fucking hate this distance that’s suddenly between us. Hate that we can’t fix this situation. Hate that I doubt whether she still wants this with me.

The silence in the room feels deafening, even as my heart pounds in my chest at the thought of losing her. Just when I can’t possibly stand it for another second, I hear her whisper my name. I feel her hand as it slides over mine, our fingers threading together.

“Fuck, Hannah,” I breathe out, rolling over so my body is covering hers.

She whimpers, her arms wrapping around me as she widens her legs and I fall between them, pushing back inside her in one hard thrust. This time neither of us closes our eyes, neither of us looking away as I fuck her hard.

Fuck her deep.

Fuck her in a way that reminds her with every thrust that she is everything to me and I am not giving her up without a fight.

I feel her nails as they dig into my skin, her fingers clinging to me as though to pull me closer. I drive into her, over and over, pushing us both closer and closer to the edge until finally she tenses around me, her whole body contorting as she comes hard and I follow quickly behind her.

Collapsing onto her, I can feel the hard beat of her heart in her chest, pounding against mine. Her body is hot, covered in a sheen of sweat as she lies beneath me, the two of us wrapped so tightly together, I don’t even know where I end and she begins.

I bury my face in the crook of her neck, my lips pressed to her skin as I inhale deeply, my eyes closed. Hannah’s grip loosens as she moves her fingers slowly up and down my back. I roll onto my side, taking her with me as my lips find hers and I kiss her deeply.

“I love you,” I whisper, pulling her closer as we both close our eyes and fall asleep.

When I wake the next morning, it feels late. God knows what time it was when we finally fell asleep last night and even though nothing was resolved, I hope that what we did, plus the new day means we can finally start to try and figure this all out.

When I roll over though, my hope quickly disappears as I find the bed empty beside me, the sheets cold and the house silent.

“Han?” I call, even though deep down, I know she’s not here.

Grabbing my phone from the nightstand, I see it’s almost ten. Scrubbing a hand down my face, I stand and pull on my briefs before wandering out to the kitchen, hopeful that she is here and maybe she just didn’t hear me call out.

But the house is empty and when I glance out the front window, I see her car is also gone.

“Fuck,” I mutter, walking back to the bedroom to grab my phone.

I hit redial on her number but it goes straight to voicemail.

Taking a quick breath as I try to calm myself down so I don’t totally lose it with this message, I exhale before speaking.

“Han, babe, just calling to see where you’re at.

I just woke up and you’re…well you’re not here, so yeah. Anyway, call me, okay? Love you.”

I hang up, hitting the bathroom for a piss before I wander back out to the kitchen. I put on some coffee, knowing I’m definitely going to need it today on account of the past forty-eight hours, before I collapse into one of the kitchen chairs as I wait for it to brew.

And that’s when I see it.

The note on the table that’s addressed to me.

Dear Leo,

I know you said we could work this out and I so badly want to believe you that we can, but I just don’t see how. Everything is a mess and a lot of it is my fault, but not everything and I’m not sure how we’re ever supposed to get past that.

Please know that I love you. So fucking much. I wish all of this could be different.

I’ve got to take care of some things, but I’ll be back for my shift tonight.

Love Hannah.

I re-read it several more times, trying to make sense of her words and what they might mean. But I have no fucking clue. I have absolutely no idea if this means she’s ending things with me or what the hell she could be taking care of that she’d just disappear like she has.

I try calling her again, but just like before, it goes straight to voicemail and this time, I don’t bother leaving a message.

Slumping back in my chair, I let out a long breath.

Fuck.