Page 11
T wisting my hand, I weave my fingers through Viktor’s. After our almost kiss the other night in the kitchen, I’ve been fighting the urge to touch him again. But it’s time to put on my big girl panties and face the facts: not touching Viktor is a losing battle.
Friends touch, right?
It doesn’t mean anything else is going to happen. He can be my nanny and my friend. Totally platonic. At least that’s what I keep telling myself.
Viktor is calming and comforting, and right now, I need a little bit of that comfort .
Closing my eyes, I let the coolness of his flesh ease my racing heart. Along with his stoic presence, it gives me the strength to go back to the hardest fucking day of my life.
The day I lost everything.
The day I almost didn’t survive.
“I’m okay. Promise.” I flash him a small smile, even though my voice shakes.
He squeezes my fingers tighter. “As long as you’re sure.
”“I am.” Nodding, I swallow past the lump in my throat.
My voice is hoarse when I continue. “Lily had just turned one, so I don’t know how much she remembers Roman.
She asks about him sometimes when she sees the pictures around the house.
I owe it to Roman to keep his memory alive for her.
” My eyes flit to my daughter. “Roman was very hands on, always going out into the fields to shoot the shit with workers. They loved him so much. Everyone did. He got up that morning like normal. Got dressed, had breakfast with me and Lily, and went about his day. If I’d known that kiss was the last one I’d ever get from him, I would have held on to him for just a little bit longer. ”
That’s when the tears start, my heart cracking when they roll down my cheeks. With my free hand, I swipe them away. Unable to bear Viktor’s beautiful crimson gaze right, I focus on our hands. His pale skin nearly glows in the fading sunlight, a direct contrast to my tanned flesh.
“He never came home that day,” I whisper, biting my tongue to hold back the sob that wants to escape.
My hand trembles in his grip, but Viktor is there, wrapping his other hand around it to calm the tremors.
“Maggie. Sweetheart. ”
Throat thick with emotion, I shake my head.
“Please, just let me finish.” For some reason, I want him to know my darkest day, and the hole I had to crawl out of to get where I am today.
I want him to shoulder some of my pain, like he shoulders the menial tasks around here.
“A brain aneurysm ruptured while he was making his rounds. The doctors said h-he died instantly.” I choke on another sob, but don’t stop, forcing the words out.
“Roman was the epitome of health. He worked out every day. He had the occasional beer with Jean-Luc or Cyrus. H-He never smoked. There were no signs that anything was wrong. It was all just a terrible accident.”
My vision blurs with tears and, suddenly, I’m pressed against a hard presence. Viktor . He’s cool like the first snowfall, but comforting, like my favorite blanket. I sink into the embrace and let the tears flow.
“I’m so sorry, Maggie. No one should have to go through that.” His fingers card through my hair, and I focus on the soothing rhythm of his other palm on my back, rubbing in circular motions. Combined, the sensations have my hiccupped breaths settling back to normal.
I’m not sure how much time passes with me cocooned in the safety of Viktor’s arms.
Eventually, I gather the courage to leave the embrace. I don’t want to pull away from the shelter of his body, but it feels like we’re crossing a line.
I wipe my face with the sleeve of my sweater and blow out a breath, blinking back my remaining tears.
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have dumped all that on you so soon.
You’re just really easy to talk to. It’s only been a week, and here I am, burdening you with my trauma.
” I laugh, but it’s more from embarrassment than anything.
Those same cool fingers hook under my chin, bringing my gaze back to his. Deep red, like two beautiful rubies. “You’re not a burden, sweetheart. Never. Not with me. Do you understand?” Sincerity oozes from his smooth voice.
Awestruck, I say nothing as his fingers continue up to my cheekbone. They twirl in a lock of stray hair that hangs by my face. The one stubborn curl that’s always escaping from my bun.
Viktor leans closer, soft breaths fanning over my face when he tucks the curl behind my ear.
I like his hands on me. His touch is soft, yet there’s an underlying possessiveness that I crave.
I finally nod.
Somewhere in the haze of my emotions, Viktor scooted his chair next to mine. His sweet masculine scent wraps around me like the hug he just gave me.
In the fading rays of the sun, he’s cast in a golden glow. Mix in his stark-white hair and pale skin, and he appears ethereal, every bit the supernatural being he is.
Damn, he’s gorgeous.
Why does my nanny have to be gorgeous—and off limits?
Viktor is like Roman, on so many levels that I could easily see myself falling for him. He’s kind, generous, smart, and hardworking. But he’s an employee. A temporary one at that.
And, right now, I need a nanny more than I need a quick fuck, which is all I could give him with the current state of my heart .
Clearing my throat, I sit back in my chair, scooting it away from Viktor’s. Hurt flashes across his eyes before they leave mine. Fuck.
“Momma, I’m tired.” Lily runs across the deck and crawls into my lap, snuggling her head against my neck. Saved from the awkwardness by my child.
My watch shows it’s only six forty-five. A little early for bedtime, but it has been a long week. Lots of new changes and adjustments with Viktor being here and me being locked away in my office, so the extra sleep might do her some good.
Viktor finally looks at me again, eyes warming when they land on Lily cuddled in my arms.
“I’m going to put her to bed, but… will you stay? I’d really like to hear how your first week went. Make sure we haven’t scared you away, city boy.” Adding the nickname, I wink and settle back into our comfortable banter. No heavy sadness, and certainly no sexual tension.
He smiles. “Of course. I’ll finish cleaning up the kitchen while you tuck her in.”
E ven though I asked him to stay, I’m surprised to find Viktor still in the kitchen when I come back downstairs.
There’s a lot of baggage in my past, I know this, and I just dumped a heaping portion onto him.
But the fact that he’s still here has my heart beating a little faster… because I need a nanny for Lily .
There’s absolutely no other reason why I’d be excited to have a hot vampire standing in my kitchen. Absolutely not.
“Hey,” I rasp, coming to stand on the opposite side of the island from Viktor.
He hangs the dish towel on the hook by the sink and turns toward me. “Did she go to bed okay?”
“She asked me to read a few more books than normal, but I think she just wanted some extra cuddles. Something I’ll never say no to.
This week was the first time in her life that she wasn’t with me all the time.
I think she took the adjustment pretty hard.
” Mom guilt churns in my gut. You’re damned if you do and you’re damned if you don’t as a mom.
“I probably shouldn’t have worked so much this week.
I’m still figuring out how to balance Lily’s needs and the needs of the orchard. ”
Society shames us for going back to work after having kids but, on the other hand, you lose all respect if you choose to stay home with your kids. It’s a lose-lose situation. Even more so as a single parent who has to fill both roles.
Viktor must sense the negative shift in my mood. He squeezes my forearm and says, “You’re an incredible mom, Maggie. Not many individuals in your situation would be thriving like you are.”
I huff. “I most definitely am not thriving. I don’t know what I would have done without you this week. You’ve been a godsend. I just wish I’d spent more time with Lily.”
“Well, tomorrow is a new day. A new opportunity to get it right. You’ll have the whole day to shower our girl with affection.”
Our girl .
“I like the sound of that,” I say, unsure if I’m talking about his claiming of my daughter or the chance to spend all day with her.
Spinning to the fridge, Viktor rummages around before pulling out a bottle of wine. “I figured you might need this after the week you’ve had.”
I can’t help but smile. “Making me dinner—and dessert. Now wine. A girl could get used to this.”
“I hope so.” He winks. “Girl like you deserves to be pampered.”
Cheeks burning from his words, my jaw drops when, instead of using a wine opener like a normal person, one of Viktor’s nails lengthens to a claw. He shoves it into the cork of the bottle and pops it free before pouring a healthy glass full of light-pink liquid.
“Hot,” I murmur before I can stop myself. “I-I mean, it’s hot in here.” I fan my face. “Why don’t we go back outside?” Smooth, Mags. Real smooth.
Viktor pours another glass of wine, handing the first to me, and we head back out into the summer night.
The sky is dark now, tiny flickers of starlight along with beams of moonlight illuminating the black canvas when I settle onto the porch swing.
It’s wide enough for two, so I pat the spot next to me until Viktor takes the hint and sits down, too.
I sigh, taking a sip of the sweet, fruity wine. “This is my favorite time of day. Everything is quiet except for the frogs and the crickets. The world is at peace.”
“It’s beautiful here. We don’t get stars like this in the city. ”
When I glance over, Viktor’s head is resting on the back of the swing, tipped up toward the constellations above us. Under the moon’s glow, the strong slope of his nose, full lips, and sharp chin are visible. A jaw cut from stone and equally carved cheekbones.
Table of Contents
- Page 1
- Page 2
- Page 3
- Page 4
- Page 5
- Page 6
- Page 7
- Page 8
- Page 9
- Page 10
- Page 11 (Reading here)
- Page 12
- Page 13
- Page 14
- Page 15
- Page 16
- Page 17
- Page 18
- Page 19
- Page 20
- Page 21
- Page 22
- Page 23
- Page 24
- Page 25
- Page 26
- Page 27
- Page 28
- Page 29
- Page 30
- Page 31
- Page 32
- Page 33
- Page 34
- Page 35
- Page 36
- Page 37
- Page 38
- Page 39
- Page 40
- Page 41
- Page 42
- Page 43