Page 55

HEARTbrEAKS, SETBACKS

SANTINO

I n the loud silence in the room, the four of them stood suspended, flies trapped in amber.

Santino’s gaze was trained on Vanessa, who slowly walked in and stopped directly in front of Zoe.

Looked her up and down from her bare tits to her toes.

Then with a sigh, she bent and picked up Zoe’s tank top and bottoms and handed them to her calmly, in a crumpled ball.

“ Tesoro …”

“Zoe, could you go put these on?” Vanessa interrupted him, her eyes still on her sister-in-law’s face.

Wordless for once, Zoe complied, hastily pulling on each garment while Bobby stared at Santino with his forehead wrinkled.

He looked like he’d aged ten years since last night.

Santino waited for a fist to strike, for Bobby to scream at him.

But neither came. There was just that horrible, confused look that slowly gave way to an even more awful understanding.

“We heard arguing from the hallway. Add soundproofing to the list of things Virgil needs to fix about this hotel,” Vanessa said.

That voice. Too calm. Santino almost wished she would yell, so he’d at least know this was still his Vanessa.

“We opened the door right about the time you talked about what really happened at their wedding.”

“What did you hear?” Zoe sneered. “That he wanted me, and I was the one who said no? I only came here looking for Bobby, but your husband took my clothes off. He said he wanted to fuck me in the shower. Why else would he be half naked like that?”

Vanessa only sighed, nodding her head slowly.

“Yeah, I can see why he didn’t tell me or Bobby about what you did back then.

He knew you’d turn it around and put it on him.

And most likely, I wouldn’t have believed him.

Now that I know exactly who I’ve been dealing with all this time, I don’t need any more explanations.

In fact, if you and my brother somehow stay together, I don’t ever want to see you again. Get out.”

Oh, thank God. She’d heard all of it, or at least enough to know this wasn’t his doing. Santino had never been more fucking relieved in his life.

“Bobby?” Zoe turned to her husband with pleading eyes. “You see it was Santino’s fault, don’t you? He said you wouldn’t care because of the arrangement, and he decided to t-try —”

Vanessa was apparently all talked out. She grasped Zoe by the arm and dragged her to the door.

“Santino can’t put his hands on a woman, but I can. Out. Right now.”

Zoe jerked her arm from Vanessa’s hold right before they reached the door.

Straightening herself, she made a show of walking out on her own.

Santino was sure she’d turn around and have a final, dramatic say, but there was nothing.

The door swung closed behind her and that was that. It was almost anticlimactic.

Vanessa went to the bedroom and moments later the sound of running water slowed, then stopped. She reappeared in the doorway, her eyes on her brother who went to sit down heavily on the couch.

“You alright, Bobby?” Santino asked.

Finally, Bobby cleared his throat. “I am having a crisis. Last week, I almost lost one of my patients on the table.”

Santino stilled. When his eyes darted to Vanessa, he saw she’d done the same. Unmoving, they stayed rooted to their spots while a tear spilled down Bobby’s otherwise expressionless face.

“I’d been scheduling back-to-back surgeries.

Everly had been sick with a high fever, and we were up with her all night.

I knew I had another surgery scheduled for the morning, but it was too late to postpone it, so I knocked back maybe three energy drinks.

I know too many of those things are bad for you, but I figured I needed it to get through.

It all caught up to me during the procedure.

Suddenly I couldn’t function. My heart was racing, I couldn’t breathe.

My hands were shaking and then the patient went into distress.

The assistant surgeon had to take over. Fortunately, they stabilized the baby, and she made it. ”

“But she’s fine now, right? She’s okay because you helped her,” Vanessa said softly, her face marked with sympathy.

“Yes, she’s okay. But I’d been afraid of something like that happening for a while. Ever since…”

They gave him a moment to sit with whatever was locked inside him, fighting its way to come out.

“I’d always had an awareness that the work I was doing was extremely important to the families of my patients.

Obviously. But there’d always been a little bit of a distance.

We were trained to keep that distance, to not take all of it personally and internalize outcomes when they weren’t good.

I managed that pretty well up until Everly was born.

“I had no idea how much I could love someone until I saw that little face. The thought of her being sick or having issues like my patients started feeling overwhelming and so did my responsibility to them, to their parents. I started getting anxious before every surgery. I’ve been trying to manage my stress, but losing it during a procedure was my worst fear coming true.

” Bobby wiped his face with the heel of his hand and gave Vanessa a cynical grin.

“And just two days before, I received word they were giving me an award. Me. Bobby Watson from the BX, getting an award for his advancements in neonatal cardiothoracic surgery. The shining star. The man who makes his mother so proud. I’m a fucking fraud.”

“Stop, man. You deserve that award,” Santino said. “You’ve got a high-stress job. You can’t expect to do everything perfect every single time.”

“No, Santino,” Bobby answered forcefully. “The parents of those babies don’t want to hear anything about my goddamn stress when they’re out in the waiting room literally praying that I get it right. If I fail, I destroy a family.”

Quietly, Santino told him, “I’ve lost people.

Even when I tried like hell to save them.

When you can’t, it hits you right here and you don’t really get over it.

” He tapped the center of his chest while Vanessa turned that sympathetic look on him.

“But you keep showing up because of the next person that needs you. And that next time, maybe you do save them. But right now, after all this, maybe you need a real break.”

Bobby’s shoulders shook with a sarcastic laugh. “That’s what this trip was supposed to be.”

“No. You made this trip about Ling. That was jumping from one stress to another one,” Santino countered.

Bobby blew out a long breath, but he nodded. “You’re right. My reasons for coming here weren’t honest. I wasn’t honest with my sister, my wife. Or myself. I thought Ling could somehow save me from my bullshit, despite what she told me. I shouldn’t have put my escape fantasy on her.”

“We saw her today.” Vanessa spoke up finally.

Santino was somehow not surprised to hear that. “So that’s where you guys were. I saw Virgil downstairs. He told me he broke it off.”

Vanessa nodded. “Yeah, she wasn’t doing so great. But I think she’ll be okay.”

“What about you, Bobby? What’re you gonna do now?” Santino folded his arms while Bobby rubbed his head.

“Go home to my baby. I don’t really have an answer about anything else right now.”

“That’s fair.” After a pause, Santino asked, “Are you coming back down with us tonight or going back tomorrow with…?” He didn’t even want to say Zoe’s name, as if doing so would conjure her like in one of Vanessa’s movies.

“I’m taking her home. No matter how fucking crazy things got up here, I can’t leave her on her own. But I think…I think I want to eat first.”

“ Marone,” Santino groaned, then grinned. “Finally, something fucking easy.”