Page 52

Cameron

A fter showering together, Nate and I fell into the upstairs bed. Thankfully, he hadn’t made some weird pretend gesture to still sleep on the couch. We’d slipped under the covers naked and fallen asleep within seconds. It was the deepest and most relaxing sleep I’d ever had.

Each dream was pleasant and pulled me deeper into the abyss of sleep. It was all blurry and nondescript, but there was a general undertone of happiness to each. That was, until the final dream, which was nothing more than a few flashes of sight and sound.

A guttural growl deep in my mind, followed my gnashing ivory-colored teeth. A yellow crescent moon high in the sky, the outline of a wolf’s head lifting toward the moon. A deep, booming howl.

My eyes snapped open, and I gasped for breath.

Sweat slicked my skin, but I also felt chills as though I was feverish.

Nate was still asleep, breathing deeply and holding me in his arms. The heat of the room was almost suffocating.

Could that be from being cocooned in Nate’s embrace?

Residual heat from our marathon sex session the night before?

I wiped the sweat off my forehead. That couldn’t be from lying beside Nate.

I was really warm. Why was it so hot in here?

How could it be hot and cold at the same time?

Something wasn’t right. My skin felt itchy and tight, like old leather stretched over a wire frame until it was ready to tear.

Even my eyeballs seemed to be growing hot.

For a moment, I had the distinct and terrifying thought that some sort of fire was roaring within me, ready to blister and peel my flesh away.

Sliding out from under Nate’s arm, I swung my legs over and put my bare feet on the floor.

The wood felt like a sheet of ice on my searing hot feet.

I let out a small sigh of relief as the cool contrast eased some of the heat, but that quickly dissipated as more heat blazed through me.

Steady thumping between my temples beat in time to my heart, growing in volume and power until I thought my skull would split open.

Opening my mouth, I tried to call for Nate, to wake him, but my mouth and throat were dry, almost like cotton balls had been stuffed down my gullet. Swallowing, I found my mouth devoid of any moisture. I coughed, swallowed again, and finally managed to speak.

“Nate?” My voice was barely more than a hoarse rasp.

His eyes snapped open at once. “What’s wrong?” he asked, sitting up, already wide awake and aware I was in distress.

“I don’t know. I don’t feel good,” I croaked. “Water. I need water.”

The look on his face told me he knew what was going on with me.

“You’re shifting,” he said.

“What?” I jerked my head around to look at him, nails scratching at my itchy breasts and arms.

“It’s your first shift.” He put a hand on my shoulder. “Take a breath. You need to stay calm. Nothing bad is going to happen.”

“It f-feels like s-something bad is h-h-happening,” I stuttered, my body shivering and shaking.

My stomach lurched, and I heaved, sliding from the bed onto my hands and knees. I didn’t vomit, but I wretched and gagged, sweat pouring off my nose to drip onto the floor below me.

“You’re fine. Cameron, you need to do your best to relax and let it happen,” he said, rubbing my back.

I couldn’t do that. It felt like I was dying. If I didn’t fight it, I’d be dead. The way my body felt, it was more like a wolf was going to come shredding out of me slicing, biting, and tearing my flesh rather than the seamless shift like I’d seen Nate do.

With every second, things became worse. My heart slammed against my ribcage like I was sprinting. Breaths came in huge, gulping gasps like I couldn’t get enough oxygen.

“Help me, Nate,” I moaned. “Help me. Make it stop.” Tears streamed down my cheeks. I wanted to wake up, wanted this to be a dream.

“You can’t stop it. You’ve got to open yourself to the wolf.”

Through the haze of my misery, I sensed a presence in the room with us, shadowy and indistinct. I snapped my head around, searching for whoever had snuck into the cabin. No one.

“There’s someone… here,” I managed, speaking through gritted teeth.

“It’s your wolf. That’s what I meant. She’s coming through. You’re starting to sense her. Let her come. She’ll feel like she’s made of the same soul, totally familiar but different. Reach out to her.”

He pushed my hair from my face and wiped the sweat from my forehead.

Swallowing hard, I clenched my eyes shut and tried to focus on his words, reaching deep into my mind toward the presence in my head rather than running from it.

Despite the terror and agony, I felt her.

She was powerful and excited. Her emotions fluttered toward me, like filaments of energy threading their way into my own mind.

Nate gently massaged my shoulders. “Let her in. She’ll flood through your body, weaving herself into every muscle and nerve down to your bones, but she won’t hurt you, Cameron. I know it’s hard, but breathe and relax. Let her come in. Let her come home.”

In a moment, maybe a half-second, the wolf flooded into me, surging forth and spreading to every inch of me. My skin became unbearably painful. My mouth sprang open, and I screamed. Then, like a switch being flipped, the pain stopped.

Opening my eyes, I found my vision changing, fading, then going sharp. Incredibly sharp, like the highest high-definition screen I’d ever seen, but instead of a screen, it was my sight. A popping sound burst through my ears, making me flinch.

“It’s okay,” Nate whispered. “That was the lid of a trashcan. Sounds like it’s over near reception.”

I could hear that far away? When I focused, I realized I could hear so much .

Crickets outside, the hoot of an owl in the far distance, and even the flush of a toilet in the cabin next door.

That was just the hearing and sight. My sense of smell was…

beyond explanation. Like gigabytes of information being downloaded to my brain through my nose.

I shook my head, trying to clear it, but my face felt strange. My jaw and tongue didn’t feel right, and my tongue seemed somehow bigger yet thinner.

“You’ll get used to shutting out what you don’t want to hear or smell,” Nate said, his voice low and whispery. He sounded like he was in awe of something.

I opened my mouth to ask him how I could shut it out, but no sound emerged from my lips.

Instead, a strange bark and growl echoed through the room.

Surprise and shock forced me to look down at my hands.

But they weren’t hands; they were paws coated in fur.

Dark, almost black fur running up to the broad chest of a wolf.

Jerking my head back up to Nate, I found him grinning like crazy.

“You’re amazing. Stunning.” He leapt to his feet. “Come look. Come see yourself.”

He hurried to the closet and opened the door, revealing the full-length mirror screwed into the wood. I went to move toward it, but my limbs were shaky and difficult to use.

“Don’t think about it too much,” Nate said. “When you think it gets more difficult. It’s as simple as walking on two legs. You don’t think about doing that. Just walk.”

Deep in my mind, the wolf murmured some kind of words of encouragement. Not in English or any language I could really pinpoint, but more like a language of emotion. With some struggle, I figured out how to walk on four new legs and made my way to the mirror.

A sleek black wolf stared back at me. When I tilted my head, the wolf in the reflection tilted its head. Nate was right. The wolf was beautiful.

Nate knelt beside me, stroking my head and back.

It felt amazing, like the best scalp massage I’d ever had, but over my whole body.

It was strange, terrifying, and exhilarating all at once.

Deep down, the cynical part of my mind had been fighting back against all this.

I’d never fully believed this would happen.

Now that I could see the wolf, feel her, and look through her eyes, I realized I was living it. This was real life.

“You’re still here,” Nate whispered, running his fingers through my fur, scratching my ribs, caressing the top of my head, and trailing his fingers across my chest.

I remembered the way his hands had felt on my body the night before. The insistent way he’d clutched at me was seared into my memory. That helped me understand that what he said was true. I really was still here. Inside the wolf, just as the wolf would be inside me when I was in my human form.

Mentally exhausted, I leaned against Nate, desperate for contact.

Some deep-seated part of me was achingly lonely.

Having Nate here wasn’t just pleasant and comforting but necessary in some way.

Was that the pull shifters felt to be a part of a pack?

If so, I couldn’t imagine how Nate survived without it.

I’d been a shifter for less than five minutes, and I was already sad to be alone.

Going years like that would surely lead to madness.

For a fleeting second, it made me pity the man who bit me. That thought was drowned out by the memory of his rage-filled eyes and the viciousness of his attack.

Head drooping, I turned to Nate, trying to figure out how to communicate with him. I was worn out, drained in a way I hadn’t thought possible.

“You probably want to go back to sleep,” Nate said. “Do you want to rest like this or in your human form?”

I gave him what I thought was a baleful look with my wolf eyes. How the hell was I supposed to answer that without my human voice?

Seeing the look on my face, he laughed. “Right. Sorry. Do you want to remain in your wolf form?”

A yes-or-no question was easier. I shook my head back and forth.

“Okay, then. We’ll need to get you back. First, close your eyes.”

Doing as he said, I closed my eyes and sank into blackness.