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“It’s fine,” I said, desperate to put the whole awful exchange behind me. “I’m starving. Let’s get food, and you can say what you need to say,” I said, though the nausea had returned, making my stomach twist.

Thirty minutes later, Rick and I were sitting in a nice restaurant, but the tension between us hadn’t dissipated. The entire ride over had been spent in awkward silence, and neither of us had wanted to start a conversation.

To top it all off, when the waiter came, Rick basically ordered me not to drink.

“She’ll have a water,” he said.

“Actually, I could go for a glass of wine,” I said, relishing the thought of dulling my frazzled nerves.

“No. Not a good idea,” Rick said, then waved the server away and went back to perusing the menu.

I wasn’t a huge drinker at the best of times, having maybe one or two glasses of wine or a couple of cocktails a week.

Rick’s casual assertion that I couldn’t have any alcohol irked me, but I didn’t want to make a scene about it.

I’d already had enough of that today to last a lifetime.

Plus, my headache and upset stomach had gotten progressively worse on the way to the restaurant.

Grudgingly, I decided that maybe it was a good idea not to imbibe anything.

When the waiter left, I glared at Rick. “You know, treating me like a child is not a good way to try and win me back, if that’s what this is.”

His head snapped up, and he looked abashed. “Oh, uh, I’m sorry. I just thought, well, you haven’t been feeling well, and if you might be?—”

“I swear to God, if you say I might be pregnant, I’m fucking walking out those doors right now. Understood?” I said, keeping my voice low so as not to be overheard.

“Right. Sorry,” he muttered, dropping his head again.

Rick had ordered an appetizer while I’d been in the bathroom, and when it came out, I nearly blew chunks at the sight of a half-dozen raw oysters on a bed of ice.

The gray, jiggly, gelatinous, snot-textured pieces of flesh in the shells nearly did me in.

I usually liked oysters, but I couldn’t stomach the thought of having the slimy meat sliding down my throat.

Thankfully, Rick seemed to be starving and ate all of them.

By the time he was done, he didn’t even notice that I hadn’t partaken.

Of course, perhaps, that had been his plan all along.

For some reason, he kept insinuating that I might be pregnant.

Raw oysters were a big no-no for pregnant women.

Had he ordered them to see if I’d actually try to eat them?

Fuck. Had my skipping the oysters made him even more sure I was somehow carrying his child? Good lord, that would be my luck. Break up with a guy just to find out I had his baby growing inside me. I was not pregnant, but it was still a horrifying thought.

While we waited for the entrées, Rick wiped his mouth with his napkin and sighed. He relaxed back into his chair and looked at me, a sad puppy-dog expression on his face.

“I’m sorry, Cameron. I shouldn’t have behaved that way earlier. I apologize for earlier this afternoon, too. I never should have told you to change your hair or anything at all. You’re perfect the way you are.”

“It’s fine,” I said, taking a sip of water.

“I get it. I should have told you I was working with the police on a case. As for your parents and what they think, that doesn’t really matter anymore.

Like I said on the phone. This”—I gestured to each of us—“is just not going to work. We’re too different.

I should have noticed it months ago. You have to see it too, Rick.

We come from totally different backgrounds. ”

He sat forward, putting his hands on the table.

“Not that different, Cam. Let me prove it to you. Come to the gala with me. Meet my parents. I’ll show you how great it is.

How about this,” he added, as though just thinking of something.

“We go just as friends. Nothing more. You get to have a great night out rubbing shoulders with celebrities and stuff, maybe even get some good info for one of your lifestyle columns. After that, we rethink this breakup. If after the gala, you’re still done with this, then I’ll take it that this was not meant to be.

” He looked at me pleadingly. “One last night? Please?”

He looked so forlorn, like I’d just killed his dog or something.

I’d always thought women who did stuff out of pity were weak and disrespectful.

Now that I was faced with the same thing, it was hard to say no.

I knew we were done, but maybe Rick needed a little more time to figure that out.

I’d sprung the breakup on him out of nowhere, too.

I sighed heavily. “One night. Just as friends, though. No funny business. Rick, I’m serious. This isn’t going to change anything.”

Despite my words, it looked like a huge weight had been lifted off his shoulders. It made me worry that he hadn’t heard my last sentence.

“Thank you, Cameron.” He smiled. “I promise, no funny stuff.”

“Good to know,” I said, nodding to the waiter as he approached and put our food down.

“I have to tell you, I still don’t like that weirdo staying around your place,” Rick said, scowling. “It doesn’t seem safe.”

“He’s a contractor with the police. He’s helping them with a case. That’s all,” I said.

“That’s something I need to look into,” Rick grumbled.

“They shouldn’t be hiring thugs in the first place, and they most definitely shouldn’t be forcing innocent people to house those same thugs, either.

It’s totally ridiculous and irresponsible.

Wait until my father hears about this. He donates heavily to the Officer’s Family Fund, you know.

He’ll have someone’s badge over this.” He jabbed a finger into the table for emphasis.

My throat went dry. I imagined Ollie having his badge and gun forcibly removed, fired over something as silly as a jealous ex.

Yet, I couldn’t tell Rick the truth. Nate had made it clear that something strange was going on, something very dangerous that shouldn’t be talked about in the open.

Not yet, anyway. Even if we were no longer a couple, that didn’t mean I wanted Rick to get hurt.

“Rick, they didn’t force me to do this,” I said, hoping to smooth things over. “I heard they would be doing investigations in my neighborhood, and I offered. The Toronto PD isn’t the Gestapo.”

Rick started eating while I pushed my food around to imitate the act of eating.

“Be that as it may,” Rick said after his first bite. “You were gracious enough to open your home to one of these people on their payroll, and the guy starts trying to seduce you the moment he gets there? It’s crazy and unprofessional.”

I gulped at my glass of water, trying not to think about the moments I spent in the bathroom with Nate and how badly I’d wanted him to seduce me.

“There was no seduction going on,” I said with a strained laugh. I really didn’t want Rick to put any puzzle pieces together. I’d just about gotten things smoothed over between us. One more night, the gala, and then we could part ways amicably.

At least I hoped that was how it would go. I didn’t need him getting irrationally jealous of a new guy, a guy I’d been about a half-step away from fucking.

“That’s silly. If anything, he was, um, trying to seduce Mom,” I said quickly, spouting off the first ridiculous thing I could think of. “She’s got a thing for tall, dark, and handsome men, and I think Nate was playing off that.”

Sheer force of will was the only thing that kept me from rolling my eyes. Really? Nate flirting with Mom? Good lord. Though, Mom would have been flattered.

“Tall, dark, and handsome, my ass,” Rick snarled.

“I know his type. Jumps into the first pair of pants they see. Even if what you’re saying is true, he was only getting on your mom’s good side to make a play for you.

I saw it in his eyes. I smelled it—I mean, I could just tell, okay?

I don’t like that guy. I know you want to take a break or whatever, and I respect that, but it doesn’t mean I can’t still look out for you. ”

“Fair enough.” I went back to pretending to eat, thankful that Rick had left his vitriol for the police department behind. Maybe I’d saved Ollie’s job after all.

After the waiter boxed up my food, we left.

The dinner hadn’t done much to ease the tension, but Rick did act a little more like his usual self after eating and getting some stuff off his chest, and after I’d agreed to go to the gala—even though I still wasn’t entirely certain he believed the part about going as just friends.

I’d put Nate from my mind, but thoughts of him returned with a vengeance when we pulled onto my street. I scanned the area for his motorcycle. When we’d left for dinner, it had been moved a block down, and Nate hadn’t been visible. Now, both he and the bike were missing.

A weird pit of disappointment opened in my chest, but something else tickled the back of my mind.

A sense that, even though I didn’t see any sign of him, Nate was still nearby.

As I got out of Rick’s car, I imagined Nate hidden somewhere, watching, his eyes roving up my legs and across my body. A shiver ran through me at the thought.

Rick stepped up behind me, taking my arm to lead me into the apartment.

My first instinct was to pull away. He must have noticed how tense I got because he quickly removed his hand.

As we walked up the stairs, I tried my best to put thoughts of Nate out of my mind, yet he seemed to be lodged in my brain, like a popcorn kernel in my teeth.

No amount of prodding or brushing could remove it.

At the door, I pulled my keys out and turned to Rick. “Thanks for dinner.”

“No problem.” He shrugged awkwardly. “Hey, what if I slept on your couch tonight?”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” I said. “Besides, I’m perfectly safe. Mom was just being weird about the whole protection thing.”

He held his hands up in surrender. “No funny business, I swear. I just want to make sure you’re safe. I’d feel better if I was here.”

Mom worked a super early shift at the hospital, and Gael had to catch the bus early.

They were probably already asleep or in their rooms. That wasn’t the issue, though.

I needed some time alone. A couple hours to lie in my bed, maybe read a book or mindlessly scroll on my phone.

So much had happened today, I needed time to process it all.

But I wanted this whole thing to go smoothly.

I’d already caved on the gala. If letting Rick sleep on the couch tonight made ending this relationship slightly easier, I’d take it.

Maybe I was being a coward, but my exhaustion made it hard to think of another way to get rid of him without it devolving into some fight.

“Okay, fine,” I said as I opened the door.

The lights were all off—I was right about the two of them hitting the sack early. Good. That meant I didn’t have to watch Mom give Rick any more disapproving looks.

“Let me finish making the couch up,” I said, dropping my purse on the table.

Rick milled around as I slid a pillowcase onto a pillow. All the while, nausea roiled in my stomach. I felt worse now than I had all day. Like I could blow chunks any second.

It made no sense. A few hours ago, I’d been fine. So fine, in fact, I’d nearly had a quickie in my bathroom with a man who was basically a stranger. This was so frustrating.

I finished his bed and awkwardly stepped back, gesturing to the couch like a kid showing off her science fair project.

“All done,” I said and backed toward the hall.

Rick nodded and gave me a lame smile. “Yeah. Thanks.”

He sat down and began to untie his shoes. He looked like he wanted to say more, but to my relief, he didn’t.

“Good night,” I said, hurrying down the hall.

“See you in the morning,” Rick said.

Once I was in my room with the door closed, the nausea abated, but it didn’t fully vanish. I quickly sent Mom a text letting her know not to freak out when she found a man on the couch. She’d see it in the morning when she woke up.

As I collapsed on my bed, I tried to figure out what the hell was going on with my life.

What was going on with me ? While I tossed and turned, I tried to tell myself it was all because of this weird sickness, but that only made my anxiety worse, imagining it as some awful thing passed on to me by the mugger.

Sleep would not come easily that night.