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thirty-one

JOSIE

I t’s been a day since I moved in, and although I’ve tried, I have checked my bond with Vic more times than I should have.

He’s been home, mostly, with some time at his office as well.

Each time I check, I swear there’s a small wave of reassurance that passes over me.

I’m not sure if it’s my own feelings or his, but either way, it’s nice.

I haven’t had much time to explore the bond with him, but with Henry closer, we’ve played a bit with sending feelings back and forth.

The experience of having a Matched Mate Bond is otherworldly, and I can only hope that my other two guys come around.

Do I want them to, though? I’m so torn on it.

My Omega wants them no matter what, but she’s a hussy who thinks of her pussy more than anything.

My brain is more logical, realizing that what they did was incredibly shitty, and perilously close to rejection. At least, by my definition.

I messaged Georgie to let her know about my situation, and she reassured me that she and James would cover everything.

It was reassuring but daunting to know that I’m dropping all my work responsibilities onto my employees.

Thinking on that, I’m extra grateful that we hired someone new to take on a single client and paperwork for the time being.

Eventually, they’ll take more clients than paperwork.

My feet carry me to the kitchen mid-morning, after letting myself laze in the bedroom since waking, I can no longer ignore my hunger.

There’s a pot of hot coffee, some pastries, and some fruit on the counter.

Happily, I make myself a plate, then find the creamer and pour a cup of life into a mug.

Looking for a soft place to sit, I wander into the living room, full of a large plush couch and a few loungers.

I slowly get myself settled in and cozy in the multiple blankets lying around, then fully relax as I drink my lifeblood and nibble on goodies.

My mood slowly sours as I sit on the couch with my treats.

Henry will be home by lunch, and he held me all night long, so I’m not feeling alone and adrift.

I’m feeling that hole in my heart where two other Alphas should be.

It’s easier to ignore those holes if I’m doing something, but when I slow down, the feels take over and it’s hard to get going again.

“You gonna cry?” a voice from across the couch asks.

When I sat, I didn’t see anyone, so I jumped a bit at the voice. Thankfully, I didn’t spill anything. Looking over, I see Ray emerging from a pile of blankets I had thought were just thrown carelessly.

“Oh, hey, Ray,” I reply.

“It’s okay if you do, you know.” She pushes.

I smile, “Yeah, I know, I feel cried out, but I still kind of want to. It’s weird.”

Ray hums, concern threaded through her voice.

“Did Henry tell you?” I ask.

“Just that you guys bonded, but only him and Vic,” she tells me.

“Want to hear some drama, then?”

She holds her hands up, a signal to stop, “Yes! But this calls for chocolate.”

Ray hops off the couch and scurries out of the room. When she returns, I’ve finished my food, but I’m taking my time with my coffee, savoring it as I go. Ray lays her stash of chocolate next to me on the couch, grabs her pile of blankets, and settles in on the other side of her stash.

“This is impressive,” I comment, running my fingers through the options.

“Right? When Henry first told me to get what I needed, I went a little wild. Once I figured out what I like, I purchased a shit ton of it. Thus, our stash for today.”

Grabbing a piece of chocolate from her stash, I smile at her as I pop it in my mouth.

She reaches forward for her own piece, and her scent wafts towards me.

I’ve gotten used to her scent, even though it’s not my favorite, but now it almost smells different.

Attempting a subtle sniff, I try to figure out what’s different about it.

It’s still extremely floral, but I don’t really hate it anymore.

I wonder why that is. Ray takes a few moments to select her piece, so I lean forward and grab a second so I’m prepared once I finish chewing this one.

Ray glances up at me for a moment before going back to hunting, “Your scent is different. I’d heard that happens, but haven’t really experienced it with someone I know.”

“What do you mean?” I ask after swallowing my first piece.

“You’re still all cinnamon-y, but now you’ve got some cedar hints and tiny hints of something else. I can’t quite put my finger on it.”

I must be emitting some of my Mates’ scents now in addition to my own. When I explain that to Ray and clarify she’s smelling sandalwood, her response is a smile and a nod.

“That makes sense! Most people I’ve met haven’t mated yet or have already mated. It’s kind of neat smelling the change.”

“It’s weird being on this end,” I tell her, “Your scent is the same, but it’s not something I mind anymore.”

Ray quirks an eyebrow and talks through her chocolate, “You sayin’ I stink?”

“No!” I reply, laughing, “But it was too floral for my own tastes. I wonder if mating with someone means you don’t mind other scents as much.”

“Now that would be cool! Okay, stop stalling, tell me the story,” Ray commands.

So, I do. I catch her up on some of the dates, some of my own history with trust issues, and how I got them.

I tell her about how I tried my best not to touch anyone with my skin because my Touch Loss means I can’t feel a Match through touch, and I didn’t want to be lied to again.

Then I talked about how each of the guys managed to touch me, and how easy it was to believe them, despite myself.

Their smells were too perfect to be anything other than a Match.

I explain the dynamics of the three guys she doesn’t know and detail our date to Date ‘n’ Busters, which gets me a lot of heart eyes and giggles from her.

She probably got more detail than she bargained for on my feelings for each of them and how they’ve grown, but I keep anything beyond kissing out of the story.

She gives me knowing looks, telling me that she’s well aware of what happens between Matches.

Then, I explain the disastrous teasing of the guys that ended in my heat starting.

Her eyes widen in surprise, and her face contorts into anger as I explain how Jesse and Simon didn’t stay.

How I watched Simon walk out the door after arguing with Henry and Vic.

I described the deep loss I felt during my heat and the despondency I’d given in to once Vic and Henry left.

“Then Henry came and swept me away here. He apologized profusely, but I’m the one who pushed him out of the house, thinking I needed to be alone.

So I don’t think he needs to apologize, and I told him that, but I’m letting him do what he needs to do to feel like he’s made amends.

I do agree with him on the living together side, though.

It feels fast, but it feels right,” I finish.

Ray sighs, looking as exhausted as I feel after that story. Her first response is to lean over, toss some of the chocolate my way, then grab her own handful. We eat in companionable silence, letting the weight of my words sink over us.

“Well, shit.” Ray finally comments.

For whatever reason, her response hits me and I can’t help but giggle. She looks at me, a little confused as to why I’m giggling, but I can’t stop now.

“That was so perfect,” I explain through the laughter.

We both give in to the moment and just laugh.

There’s nothing particularly funny about what she said, but the simplicity and the accuracy of her response was so anti-climactic, and that just struck me as funny.

A complete laughing fit hits us, and anytime we calm, our eyes meet, and we just start all over again.

It’s cathartic in a way I didn’t know I needed.

When we finally calm down, Ray looks at me and asks, “So, are you, like, super angry?”

“No, I’m just sad,” I sigh.

“Well, that’s dumb,” she says with the tact of all her teenage years.

“Oh?”

“Yeah, I mean, be sad, I guess, but you should be angry. You should be pissed!”

I can see where she’s coming from, but I’m not sure if I really have the ability to get angry about it.

“I guess so, I just feel sad and abandoned, you know? It was their choice not to stay. How can I be mad at them for doing what they felt they needed to?”

Ray throws her hands into the air, “How can you not be? Yeah, they said they weren’t ready for a bond, so why not just ask if they can join but not bond?

You weren’t exactly in a rational place to think about proposing that, and if they really wanted you so badly, why didn’t they fight for you?

I’m aware that I’m technically still in high school, but that doesn’t mean I’m dumb. ”

“I never said you were!” I protest.

“I know, I know, I’m just saying I get it more than people would assume for someone my age.” She waves me off.

“You are technically an adult,” I say, nodding my head in mock seriousness at her.

“Ugh, don’t remind me. Henry’s going to make me go to college even though I am a legal adult,” she whines.

“Don’t you want to go? You could tell him you want something else, I think he’d listen,” I tell her.

“No, I want to go, I just want to whine about it.”

Her response makes me smile, reminding me of myself a little at that age. Knowing you need someone to push you, but not wanting them to do that at the same time.

“Back to you,” she pivots the conversation seamlessly.

I sigh in response, “Back to me.”

“I know you don’t want to, but I think you need to get angry.

Tell them how it is and make them Alpha up for you.

They don’t get something as precious as your sorrow.

They deserve your wrath. They deserve to hear exactly how they fucked up.

There should be romance novel level groveling happening here! ” she exclaims.

“Romance novel level? That’s pretty intense. How do you know what that looks like?” I ask.

“Never mind that, I just do.” She waves me off again.

“Ray…” I taunt her, trying to get her to admit what romance she’s reading.

Her phone alarm starts at that very moment, conveniently.

“Oh! Look at the time, I need to get ready and go to my afternoon classes. I tested out of a couple classes, so I get quiet mornings a few days a week. Remember, get angry! You deserve justice for yourself!” Ray cries out as she exits the room.

I watch her go with a small smile on my face. She is going to be a full force of nature when she fully comes into herself. I’m lucky I get to watch her grow and find out exactly who she is as she finishes high school and embarks on college.

The house is quiet once she leaves, and I put my coffee cup into the sink before giving myself a small pep talk.

“Right. Anger. I can do anger. I should do anger. Those two were dickheads and I deserve better! Who do they think they are, anyway?” I say out loud, looking at the tile behind the sink on the kitchen wall.

“Who does who think they are?” I hear Henry’s deep voice say.

My head whips to the side, realizing I didn’t hear him come into the house.

“Hey!” I exclaim before launching myself at him.

Henry catches me easily and we hum contentedly, neither of us hiding that we have our noses buried in each other’s necks, savoring each other’s scents.

After a moment, Henry pulls back, and once I do as well, he greets me properly with his lips.

He walks us further into the kitchen and sets me down on a counter.

Unfortunately, that’s all he does. I whine as he backs up a half step.

“Who are we getting upset about?” he asks, tucking a hair behind my ear.

“Jesse and Simon. Ray and I talked about things a bit this morning, and she said I should be angry, not sad.”

Henry hums, “What do you think?”

“I think I’m both, if I’m being honest. Being angry isn’t something I’m used to being, though, and I don’t know what to do with it,” I confess.

“You tell them exactly how you feel and how badly they fucked up.”

I nod in agreement, “Okay, yeah, I can do that.”

“That’s my girl,” Henry says with a grin.

“Um, can we have sex first? I would really love an orgasm right now,” I ask shyly.

Henry groans, “Fuck yes we can.”

He carries me upstairs, inciting giggles from me as we go. Having Henry on my side is everything, and I refuse to let the rest of my Matches back out of this.

This Omega is going to kick some ass. After she gets dicked down.