Page 31

31

SKYE

So much has changed. I’ve changed, but I cannot and will not sit back and let the world go by as I watch on.

I sat at my parents’ house for three days; I couldn’t wait a minute more to see him.

He has texted every day, almost every hour. Checking in on me, asking me how I am. But all it did was make me want to see him more. To wrap myself around him, for him to hold me.

Fed up with people turning up at my mom and dad’s place, with flowers and gifts, and food—God, so much food—I needed to get out of the house. It felt stifling. Like I’d become the next exhibit at the petting zoo.

I don’t want to be treated any differently, but Mom explained how everyone wanted to help in some way.

I get it. I really do. And while I am grateful for the enormous kindness and generosity the entire community has shown me, right now, I don’t want the constant reminders of what happened to me because it could have been worse; much, much worse.

Thankfully, it wasn’t, and I’m here and alive and I’m not prepared to not live my life because of him.

When the sexual assault test came back negative, I made my decision. I can’t play the victim. I won’t allow it. I have so much to be grateful for.

I’m alive.

I’ll be damned if I let him impact the rest of my life or prevent me from living my best life or from having adventures.

The good news kept on coming when the police informed me this afternoon that Jules was admitted to a psychiatric hospital under the Mental Health Act until further notice.

As soon as the police left, I made the decision that I would educate people. Show them what to look out for, the red flags—the ones I didn’t pay attention to.

I was put through this ordeal for a reason, and if this is what I was put on this earth to do—to educate others and help—then that’s what I will do. Even if it means I only save one person, I will have still saved one person.

But no one, nope, not even a seriously unwell man with an unhealthy obsession for me, will stop me.

I’m grabbing life by the balls and I’m making sure I get my happy ever after and that’s how I talked my dad into reluctantly driving me here as I wasn’t quite ready to drive myself here in the dark.

So here I am, with my arms laced around Jacob’s neck. He’s what I need, the one I crave, the one that breathes air into my lungs, and the one that saved me because he loves me.

I’ve fallen for him. Fallen hard. I’m so deeply in love with him I’m drowning and I’m not sure I ever want to come up for air.

It caught me unawares… threw me off balance, but he’s what I need and he’s been standing in front of me all along in plain sight and I’m not letting some childhood promise to his best friend stand in our way for a second longer.

I’m looking up at him as he hovers over me; he cups my face with his hands and asks me, “Are we really doing this?”

I smile back at him as my heart fills with love for this beautiful human being. “Yes, we are,” I reassure him, hooking my fingers into the waistband of his boxers.

He helps me remove them fully, then he throws them away and I look down to get a proper look at him.

“You have a beautiful cock. I can’t wait to taste you.”

“Those are words I could only have ever dreamed about before.” He looks nervous as he bites his lip.

“You’re not dreaming anymore.”

For the first time ever, our bodies touch one another. Chest to chest, lips on lips, he presses himself firmly against me.

My body comes alive, quivering in anticipation, every nerve ending tuned in to his movements as he glides his hands all over me.

We slowly explore each other, learning every small detail, with our hands, tongues, and lips.

We’ve been waiting for this moment. Desperate to be together.

Finally, we’re here and it couldn’t be more perfect.

My heartbeat shoots through the roof when his firm and expert mouth moves from my jaw to my neck, licking the exact spot I told him I loved just a few days ago, causing me to shudder; goosebumps dance across my skin.

It feels like months have passed since we were sitting on Violet and Lincoln’s sofa, but it’s not. It’s only been a week.

The rush of lust and static electricity runs between us as he drifts his fingertips down my neck, then my chest, until he reaches my hardened nipple. He pulls a gasp from my throat when he pinches it between his deft fingers.

Moving down my stomach, over my skirt, he skims his hand over my outer thigh. I hold my breath for a second when he moves his touch up the inside of my thigh, then back down again. He does this over and over, teasing me, tickling me until I can’t take it anymore.

Desire sizzles, pleasure burning my skin as emotion floods into my heart.

“I want you, Jay.” I grab his hand and lead him under my skirt, guiding him where I want him to touch me.

“I want to be everything you need.” His hard length digs into my leg as he mumbles against my lips.

“You already are.” I press his fingers to my center, making my back arch off the bed. He slips my panties to the side and I gasp when he touches my pussy for the first time.

I let go of his hand and reach out to cup his balls.

He stops kissing me, his open mouth against mine as his eyes roll back into his head.

“Stroke me,” he gasps, sliding his finger down my pussy lips. Flames lick around our self-control, as the fire between us burns hotter by the second.

Using my thumb to rub the precum over his tip, I fist my hand around him and begin to stroke him soft then tight, soft, and then tight.

“Aw fuck,” he mutters against my lips, as he bucks his hips, fucking my hand. “Are you wet for me?” He doesn’t wait for my answer as he pushes his thick finger deep into my body, curling it inside of me as he slides it in and out, as if beckoning me to come; my lungs struggle to find air.

His dark eyes intensify, making my heart zoom.

“So wet for you, Jay.” Synchronized, we both moan together. “I want you inside of me. I need to feel you.”

I stop stroking him to find the buckle of my wrap skirt. Undoing it quickly, I pull one side apart, then the other, as if giving myself to him, pulling it out from underneath me.

“You should wear this skirt all the time,” he says, still sliding his finger back and forth.

Naked now aside from my panties and socks, I lean to the side to pull them off but he stops me.

“Leave the socks on,” he commands, his voice deep and laced with sin.

I’m distracted by his command when he pushes another finger inside of me and I cry out from the feeling of him stretching me.

“Getting you ready for me, Butterfly.” His thumb rubs my clit, making me instantly feel the need to come.

“Oh, God,” I cry out. “I’m gonna—” I can’t form my words as he hovers over me with a look of sheer passion in his dark eyes. Thrusting his fingers deep, up to his knuckle, he curls them inside of me, touching a spot so deep inside that I can’t remember my own name. He presses his thumb against my swollen bud again and I explode around his fingers, bucking myself into them as I chase my orgasm.

I don’t want it to end as stars burst like dazzling glitter behind my eyes. The feeling of happiness and joy dances across my skin.

I reach for his hand that’s inside of me, to hold him still and to allow me to hold on to this incredible feeling a little longer.

“I think you needed that,” he whispers in my ear.

“What do you expect after weeks of all this foreplay we’ve been doing together? You’ve been edging me for what feels like forever.”

He chuckles against my skin, kissing my neck gently, then he licks it, causing a wave of pleasurable shivers down my back.

I let go of his hand and as he removes his fingers from my body, he looks me dead in the eye when he sucks them into his mouth.

He closes his eyes as if it’s the best thing he’s ever tasted.

I could watch him for hours. He’s so hot and his body is insanely sexy.

Like his tattoos that bleed across his skin, I want him to cover me with his body. I want to lose myself in him. Forever.

He slips my panties off one leg, then the other, before he sucks my nipple into his mouth, pinching then rolling the other between his fingertips.

I’ve never been much of a fan of nipple play in the past, that is, until now.

It’s as if all of my senses have switched on like he’s my lighthouse… he’s my home. His body speaks to me in ways I can’t describe, but everything feels… perfect.

He flattens his tongue over my nipple and sucks it into his mouth, giving it a gentle tug between his teeth, causing me to squirm.

“You have the perfect body, Skye. I think it likes me.”

It loves you.

“ Your body responds to everything I do.” He flicks his tongue fast over my nipple and a feeling deep in my pussy makes me feel like I could come again.

Loving the sensation, I moan, pushing my chest into his face.

“I’m going to make you feel so good, Butterfly.” With the need to find his own release, he leisurely fists his cock.

I reach for him, guiding him to me. “I have a contraceptive implant.”

He frowns, and then it dawns on him. “Really? Bare? With you? I’ve never…”

I nod, smiling up at him, telling him it’s what I want.

Adrenaline rushes through my veins, knowing what comes next as we get to the point we’ve both been desperate for.

He moves his knees closer to me and I widen my legs to welcome him.

He bows his head, hesitating then hisses, “Fuck.”

“What’s the matter?” I place my pointer finger under his chin and lift it, so he can look at me.

His frown lines deepen as he admits, “I’m gonna fucking blow in like three seconds of being inside of you, Skye. I… I… I just…”

“Shh.” I place my finger to his lips to hush him and tilt my hips. I then grab his ass, guiding the tip of his cock inside of me. “I don’t care. That means we get to do it more than once.”

His eyes fix on me as he pushes in a little before pulling out slowly. Moving again, he pushes in a little further and he holds there, staring at me, as if not believing that we are crossing into this forbidden territory.

He slides back and forth, taking his time. All the while, his thumb moves back and forth across my temple.

I’m done with waiting, so I grab his ass again, hard, and pull him into me, making us both cry out in pleasure.

“Fucking hell, Skye.” He looks at me as if to say, what are you doing to me? “Christ, I feel like a goddamn virgin again.”

I smile up at him. “I want you.” I lace my fingers around his neck, pulling him down to me, and kiss him with undeniable passion and love. The love I feel for him is like nothing I have ever felt before. It runs in my veins, through my sanity, and makes me feel giddy all of the time.

“Fuck me,” I mumble against his lips.

“I never thought I would say this, but you telling me to fuck you is so hot. Especially since you never swear.”

“This good girl is going bad,” I giggle. This urges him to finally move and when he does, he gasps and moans as he glides in and out.

“You feel so fucking good, Butterfly.” He rests his open mouth against mine, not kissing, barely touching, as our hot breaths dust each other’s skin.

I wrap my legs around his waist, digging my heels into his ass, urging him to go deeper.

His hand runs down and up my leg as we rock together, finding our rhythm. His pelvis rubs my clit over and over as he goes a little deeper with every thrust.

I cry his name a few times as he picks up pace, burying himself deep within me; he widens his knees to give him more power behind his movements.

My mouth leaves his lips as his thrusts make my back arch off the bed, and I feel every part of him inside of me, the head of his cock teasing my G-spot.

“You are mine,” he growls before he sucks my nipple into his mouth and bites down.

“Oh, do that again.” I push my chest into his mouth for him to repeat his action.

“Come for me, Butterfly. Wet my cock with your tight pussy.” His filthy words are my undoing, causing the beginning of my orgasm to weave its way through my body.

He bites down, then flicks my nipple with his tongue, and the orgasm that’s been building suddenly explodes, causing me to cry out his name, claiming him as mine.

My whole body lights up like the fourth of July, my legs shaking, the sensations ripping through me like an avalanche.

His grunts and thrusts become feral as he fucks me through my orgasm, pounding me into the bed. I want more. I want all of him and I don’t want him to ever stop. It feels like we’ve been doing this forever together.

Skin on skin, he fucks me harder, my hands exploring his hard body, memorizing every part of him, praying he can feel my love for him pouring through my touch, as he slides into my heart, flooding my soul in the best way possible.

“I want to go on top,” I gasp.

Without hesitation, he loops his gigantic arm around my waist and flips us over. Never losing the connection, I sit upright. Moving my pelvis back and forth, I grind my clit against his pelvic bone.

The low light across the room makes him look darker, his pecs flexing, his tattoos almost dancing like shadows across his body.

I run my hands down his chest. “You’re so sexy, Jay.” Butterflies dance in my lower stomach, knowing he’s all mine.

He reaches up and pulls the elasticated hair band out of my long silver locks.

I shake my hair to fluff it out.

Looking up at me with hooded eyes, he smirks. “You should see yourself. Sexy as fuck. Your hair.” He thrusts. “Your fucking beautiful body.” Another thrust. “Your nipples are fucking delicious.” Another thrust. “And these fucking socks.” He pings the elastic hem of my thigh-high socks. “They will be my undoing. You’ll be the death of me, you sexy little minx. Aw fuck. I’m gonna—” He squeezes his eyes shut.

“Look at me.” I move my hand behind me and squeeze his balls, making his eyes fly open.

I squeeze them tighter, clenching the inner walls of my pussy, as I reach down to play with my clit.

And I rock, fuck me, do I rock my hips to give him the ride of his life. Because while a slow gentle love-making session would have been nice, it would be exactly that, nice, and that’s not what I wanted. This is everything I want and more, and he needed this to finally bond us, to show him I’m not shy or quiet. I know what I want. Him. I want to show him the real me, the one I have always wanted to feel like. To feel free, loved, and adored. To be myself and let myself go.

He moves my hand out of the way to take over, pinching my clit. He rubs it then pinches it again, repeating the same motion over and over. Molten desire floods my core as I come again, taking him with me, as I tighten my grip on his testicles.

“Aw Jesus Christ, what the fuck—aw, Skye. What are you doing to me?” Words that make no sense spill out of his mouth as he shoots his load inside of me, filling me with his cum.

I arch my neck back, my eyes rolling into the back of my head as I shudder and clench all around his cock. The feeling of my release burns between my thighs and low in my spine.

He pants, his chest heaving. He slowly sits up, looping his arms around me. “That was the best fuck of my life.”

Too tired to speak, I rest my head on his shoulder, letting him hold me.

“Hey, are you okay?” He lightly strokes my back.

“You made me orgasm three times. I’m tired,” I mumble against his skin.

He laughs out loud, making his chest rumble. “You ain’t seen nothing yet.”

I nuzzle into his neck and sigh. “Can you show me tomorrow?” I say sleepily on a yawn.

“C’mon, my little sleepy Butterfly.” He lies back and rolls us onto our sides then slowly slides out of me, and I miss the feeling of him inside me already.

The weight of his stare makes me pop one eye open.

“Hi.” His smile is wider than the Grand Canyon.

“Someone is looking pretty smug with themselves.” I hook my leg higher up his waist. His hand instantly grabs my ass, and he gives it a squeeze.

Staring at each other for a while, he finally breaks the silence. “I love you,” he whispers, sending a thrill of energy up my spine.

I go to speak, but he places a finger over my lips. “Don’t.” He shakes his head. “Not yet.”

He kisses me softly, setting my heart on fire. “I’ll go get a washcloth to clean you up.” Turning over, he jumps off the bed, and he’s back before I know it, cleaning me between my legs.

“No one has ever done that before.” I suddenly feel self-conscious.

He clenches his eyes closed with a half-smile, half-cringing. “I didn’t want to know that.”

Shit. I’ve only ever been with Owen. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine.” He urges me to get under the bed sheets. “C’mon, Butterfly, shuffle under.”

I struggle because I can’t be bothered moving. I’m so tired, my body feeling like a dead weight, I can barely lift my head off the pillow. I do an awkward worm type movement, making Jacob laugh until I snuggle deep inside the covers.

“Your bed smells nice,” I mumble.

“Does it?”

“Yeah, it smells like you.” I inhale his scent again. It instantly makes me feel calm.

Jacob slips in next to me and I wiggle in closer to his bare chest when he threads his arm under my head, snuggling me into him like this is the most natural thing in the world and we’ve been doing it for decades.

Resting my hand on his chest, he lays his hand over mine. Almost asleep, my heavy limb is lifted off his chest and is held up in midair. I open my tired eyes and watch him as he examines the bruises around my wrists, running his thumb over my deep blue and purple marks.

“Are they sore?”

“No.” I pull my hand out of his and tuck it under the covers to hide my injuries. At least those will fade; others will last longer and be embedded in my memory forever.

“You know I’m here for you come rain or shine. You can talk to me about anything.”

“I know.” I turn onto my back, moving his arm from behind my head, and stare at the ceiling.

Jacob turns onto his side to look at me; he props his head on his hand. “Tell me what you’re thinking?”

I dive under the covers to remove my long socks. “Well, for a start, these have to come off, because I get really hot feet at night.”

“Righhhttt. And…”

I throw them onto the floor and turn to face him again, tucking my hands under my cheek. They aren’t so sore anymore and even though I was hit hard, the skin on my face is healing quickly, with fewer blood spots around my ear now, too. It’s less red than it was and the scratch has almost gone. It was mostly superficial but still hurt like a bitch, and I still look like I’ve been slapped across the face, worse on one side than the other.

“I hate what he did to me and how he made me feel,” I whisper.

“How did he make you feel?”

“Stupid.”

“You’re the smartest woman I know.”

“Not smart enough to see the signs or not meet him or share things with him in private emails.” I don’t know how many times I’ve voiced this to my mom already.

“He’s a predator. That’s what they do.”

“He’s a maniac.”

“That too.”

“He made the room he kept me in look like a replica of my bedroom.” I pull a little thread from the pillowcase. “He bought clothes from the same shop I go to. He even bought the same makeup I wear. He said he did it to make me happy, but all I felt was scared. I was petrified.”

Jacob gives me space to think.

“I can’t go back to the room I rent. I’m having Kimmy pack all my things for me but leaving all the furniture. I don’t want it and I’m going to move in with Mom and Dad until I get a new place. A place of my own.”

“You could move in with me.” Jacob lays his hand over mine to stop me playing with the thread.

I look deep into his eyes. “Although we know each other really well, we don’t know each other romantically and I’ve never lived with a boyfriend before…”

“Skye, I know you better than anyone else. I know what time you have breakfast and what time you reapply your lipstick in the afternoons. Where you buy your coffee from. I know you better than I know myself.”

“I think you do.” My heart pounds in my chest as it whooshes with emotion. He’s so sweet, and he doesn’t know how beautiful he is.

“I fucking love you with every breath in my body, every blood cell within me. I care for you and I want to love and protect you for the rest of my life.”

“I know, big guy.” I pat his hard chest mockingly, trying to wave off his sweet words that might make me cry again. I am done with crying. “I quite like you too though. Just in case you’re wondering.”

“Was that before or after the sex?”

“Before,” I snort. “The sex was, well… average.”

He turns onto his back and mutters, “Some people are difficult to please.”

Then we both burst out laughing.

Jacob isn’t usually the playful type, but I feel like I’ve unlocked a new level with him these last few weeks and then another after what we just did in his bed.

Sex with Jacob Baxter is another level I wasn’t prepared for.

They do say sex with your soul mate can be life-altering.

I think perhaps I found mine in him.

“I have to tell you some things,” I whisper.

He turns to face me again, mirroring my position, and rests his hands under his cheek too. I reach out and run my hand down his soft scruff. I’m most likely to have a beard rash on my chin tomorrow. It already feels raw.

“Share away.” He looks concerned.

I clear my throat, preparing myself for the first and not the last time I say these words. “You can’t ever call me doll face, baby doll, or dolly. Ever. When I testify against Jules in court, I will no doubt have to repeat these words that sound creepy to me now.”

“Okay.” He nods in understanding.

“You’re not to treat me any differently. I will not let that evil psychopath ruin my life.”

“Understood.”

“I don’t want any special privileges at work.”

He frowns as if disagreeing with me.

“I mean it,” I say firmly.

He doesn’t agree or disagree.

“I want to speak to a therapist. I think I should speak to someone outside of Castleview Cove. Someone in Edinburgh maybe.”

“I’ll take you.”

I knew he’d say that.

“I want to tell you everything, but I’m not quite ready.”

“That’s okay.”

“Two more things. I think I would like to, maybe, eventually, share my story. Not sell it to the papers or anything but do talks, digital media awareness training in schools and universities, perhaps. I’m living proof that you can work in the digital media industry and still fall subject to its dark side.”

“My father will be one hundred and ten percent on board with that. We’ll support you and give you time off work to do it.”

“Thank you.”

“Anything else?” he asks, pulling me to him. I hook my leg up over his hips again, loving the way he feels against my skin. His solid frame is addictive and I could spend forever being wrapped around him like this.

Our lips brush together. “I’m in love with you, Jacob Baxter.”