Page 51

THIRTY

AUGUSTE

Feels like forever since we’ve had a day off.

From individual training to training camp, I’m beat.

Nowhere beat enough to ignore the fact that Court is in my bed, cuddled up to me in nothing but my t-shirt, my face plastered on the front.

I’ll have to thank the kit guy for doing it all for me, even if he thought I was being a weirdo.

And so what if I was? It looks fucking incredible on her.

“You’re staring again,” Court mutters, wriggling deeper into my side. “The TV is up there, not down here.”

I catch her hand as she gestures down her body and lace our fingers together. “That's why I told you to pick the movie. You watch the TV and I watch you. That way everyone is happy.”

The grin perma-glued to my face cuts wider when I follow the length of her legs to her feet and find Sammy curled up there.

I know étienne said I’m being stupid getting involved with Courtney and being honest with her has given her the nails to my coffin.

But he’s wrong, about her. I’m certain that Court would never use any of it against me.

Besides, since becoming a dad étienne’s more cautious and protective of our family, and I get that Coach will be pissed when he finds out. But again, Courtney is worth it. Another certainty I own.

Court goes back to watching Titanic on the TV and I go back to watching her.

The thing about her is that she wears her thoughts on her face.

So when her brows pinch and her lips take on that hurt pout I can’t stomach, I tune into the movie.

The scene is a blow up between the mother and daughter, and when I look back at Courtney, there’s heavy tears in her eyes .

I don’t like to pry into the situation with her mom, I know when she’s ready to talk to me about it, she will. Still, I coil my arm tighter around her and squeeze her hand in mine as I roll her on top of my chest.

“What are you doing?” she asks, nuzzling deeper into me.

There’s always a split second where she balks when I show her affection. And I fucking hate that it’s so foreign to her, that her instinct is to shy away from it or make light of it.

Still, I smile and coil my arms tighter around her.

“I’m hugging you. That okay?”

Blue eyes flash to mine. Wet and sad. When she nods her tears bead on her long lashes.

“Have I told you how beautiful you are?”

Courtney shakes her head at me with an exaggerated roll of her blue eyes. Crossing her arms across my chest, she watches me silently for a beat.

Then something shifts in her stare and her body melts into mine. Not an easy surrender, more like weariness. As though there’s too much weight on her shoulders for her to hold it up anymore.

“Can I tell you something?” she asks too quietly.

“You can tell me anything, Court.”

“No, like personal. Like, about my mom… my dad.”

“Yes,” is all I say. The last thing I want is to overwhelm her with too many words.

“I found something out yesterday, and I don’t know what to think about it anymore.

All this time I believed that my dad distanced himself from me…

” Tear logged eyes meet mine and it takes all my control not to suffocate her with my hold.

“Turns out that’s not the truth. Well, not the whole picture. ”

That makes sense, because Coach is big into family. Into our team being tight like a family unit. I can’t imagine him not being present for his own daughter when he’s always there for his players.

“He calls my mom every week to check on us… on me… and I didn’t know.

She never told me. She never defended him when her husband talked shit about him or when I refused to go out of my way to visit him.

I always thought… I always—” Court cuts off with a jagged breath.

“I was so angry with him for giving up on us… on me , and now… I… I feel like a terrible person.”

“You can’t help what you don’t know, Princess.”

My thumb rubs slow circles on her nape while she continues staring at my jaw, and I’m too down bad for this girl to control the urge to kiss her.

First the tip of her nose, so light she whimpers when I lift my lips to her forehead and hold them there.

It’s part kiss, part caress, part desperation to ease the hurt dripping from her cheeks onto my jaw.

Sluicing down my neck, strangling all that’s left of my cool with the wretchedly contained sob that gurgles from my girl.

“Shit, I’m sorry,” her voice is a mortified snort as she attempts to roll away from me. “This is not what we’re about… I’m sor?—”

“Hey, apologize again and I’ll spank every fucking reason why this is exactly what we are about into you.”

“Auguste—”

“Shut up, Courtney.” I roll her onto her back, caging her in with my arms as I tell her, “This, right here , is your safe space. Me.”

Her frown fixes on my hand, flattened to my chest. “I don’t know how to do this.”

“Neither do I.” Her eyes flash up to mine. “What? I’m twenty-three and I’ve spent my whole life so far focused on my career. Relationships and girls weren’t on my to-do list before.”

“Before?”

“You.”

“Me?” The question is a mousy whisper. “Why me?”

“Honestly? Because you felt like home.”

That’s the truth. The only truth of everything I’ve done, of everything I feel, and everything we are.

Courtney is the only person that I’ve looked at and every memory I have of my family comes back to me.

The good ones that brighten up my world.

I look at her and I feel that echoing awe that I’ve witnessed between my parents.

Between étty and Marley when they look at each other for that split second too long with certainty and ease…

with a promise that no matter what, everything will be okay.

"I haven’t had a home in a long time,” Court murmurs, tears rolling down her temples.

“You have me now.” My hand slides into her hair, my thumb brushing the back of her neck as I maneuver onto my side and roll her into me.

Courtney’s eyes search mine. As though she can’t quite figure out what that means.

So I tell her, “You can break here. With me. I’ll catch you.

Whenever, wherever, however.” I pull her closer, like I can fuse us together forever.

My palm finds her cheek, and I hold her like she’s all I’ll ever need.

“More than that, Court, you can heal here too. When you’re ready, I’ll be here to put you back together.

No matter what, Princess, I’ll make everything okay for you when you’re ready. ”

With a nod, she nuzzles her face into the top of my chest while her arm wraps around my waist, fingers clawing into my bare skin. No one has ever held on to me this tight, with such necessity that I feel it in the marrow of my bones. There’s nowhere else I’ll ever want to be except with her.

“How about we use those tickets I got you? We can go see that private exhibition you were looking up and then grab some lunch.” I expect Courtney to find an excuse to say no, but instead she nods, and in a move that completely blindsides me, she presses a kiss to my chest.

It’s tender and sweet and my heart stutters like a fool when she looks up at me and smiles. “Your family is leaving tomorrow. Don’t you want to spend time with them?”

“étty got a boat for this afternoon. It’s cooler for the boys and he’s meeting up with friends this morning while my parents make use of the spa treatments we booked for their anniversary.”

“What about your sister?”

“Sabine is being Sabine. She likes doing her own thing and exploring places on her own. I think she inherited Mom’s wanderlust. When she met my dad, she was a flight attendant and he was the equipment manager for the hockey Olympic team that year. That’s how they met.”

“Sounds like fate.”

“Yeah…” Like hammering my coach’s daughter in the head with my puck.

I don’t tell her that though, not yet. One day when we’re looking back at all these moments, I will. I’ll point out that I knocked her right off her feet.

“If you don’t have any plans later, you can come hang out with us. My mom and Marley would love me for bringing you.”

“I don’t want to like… intrude on your brother’s plans again. He was gracious enough about me crashing your family’s celebration?—”

“You were invited by our mom, there was no crashing. And now, I’m inviting you because I want you there.

I want to make the most of every second we have.

I know étty was grumpy and short, but it wasn’t because of you.

” Big blue eyes widen in question. “I promise. He was mad at me for… umm… watching you without your consent. Then he was mad at me for telling you about it. It shouldn’t surprise you when I tell you that he’s super protective of our family, so me telling you what I did, is a big red flag for him. ”

A soft hand palms my face. “I’m not going to get you into trouble. Sure, I mean, the stalking was very red flaggy but…”

“But?”

A deep flush tinges her face. Blooming on the bridge of her nose and spreading to the tips of her ears. “But I don’t hate the idea of you watching me.”

“You don’t hate it…”

Courtney shakes her head. “I don’t hate watching you either. It’s kind of addictive and comforting. Like having you there even though you’re not there.”

“So you’re admitting that you do want me around. That you like me near you.”

I fucking adore the giggle that bubbles from her chest. It contrasts the teary red still staining her eyes, lightens it a tad. “Don’t make it a thing, Masterchef.”

“Oh, it’s a thing, Princess.”

Courtney nods, her lips brushing my jaw as she trails the elastic of my silk cap with her fingertips. She keeps looking at me like she’s waiting for permission on what to do next.