Page 49
Tugging my t-shirt off, I pull the jersey on. It’s huge.
Jayden is huge—tall and broad… and his jersey is drowning me as I pull at the hem and attempt to make it fit better by tying it into a knot around my hips.
It doesn’t matter what I do to it, it feels wrong. But I don’t have a choice and there is a little spark… a teeny tiny fizz in my chest that is a little, tiny bit thrilled to see Auguste’s reaction.
And yes, I know it’s a bad idea the second I walk out the door. I know it’s a bad idea when I walk down the tunnel to the bench .
But what really seals the deal is when all heads turn my way, and every single guy on the team is silent.
Jayden shakes his head at me with a groaned curse as he gets up and jumps the board onto the ice. Eli follows, Erik… Oliver… Ansel… even Dylan hops the boards clumsily in all his goalie gear. Leaving only one person. One man, staring daggers at the numbers on my sleeves.
Auguste.
He says nothing as he gets up and walks the length of the bench towards me.
He says zilch when he pauses and gives me a head-to-toe nod.
Not a single word or sound leaves his mouth while he backs away onto the ice, skating backwards across the rink, towards Jayden.
Eli steps between them, defending his partner from their center.
I have no idea what is said, but Matheo and Erik are there in a flash, motioning to the guests watching them.
Thankfully the coaching team joins them and that seems to diffuse the situation. Momentarily at least.
The silence is endless. I keep checking my phone for a reply to my message telling Auguste I’m on my way home. Not that he asked me to let him know, but he’s waited for me pretty much every day for weeks and now we’re… something .
I think.
He asked me to be his until I leave. That’s something, right?
I swipe out of our message thread, and focus on the call with Delilah.
“Long distance relationships are a thing. Lots of people have them, and he’s proven he’s into watching you and you’re obviously into it too, so?—”
“So, that’s not what we agreed.” Sometimes I wish I kept my mouth shut instead of telling Delilah every detail of my life.
But she’s one of the only people that’s always been honest with me. That’s never screwed me over, and I’m realizing lately that there’s a lot of those people in my life.
Which is why I poured my chaotic heart out to her about Auguste. Because in spite of everything he’s done, he’s always been there when I needed someone. When I didn’t know I needed him . Every time I pushed him away he always came back.
Auguste has shown me and regaled me with more grace than I have given myself. And it’s a quality I’m finding really fucking rare in people at present.
“Honestly, I think it’ll be a waste if you don’t give whatever the two of you have a chance. And maybe after the way things started with the two of you, putting it to the test with distance isn’t a terrible thing.”
“Maybe,” I sigh, getting out of the Uber when it stops outside the condo. “I don’t know. I’ve never had a relationship before.”
“Because you’ve never allowed any guy to get close to you. Which again, racks up points for The Puckinator.” There’s a beat of quiet as I allow her words to percolate. “Anyway, what are we reading next? I’m in the mood for smut.”
“We just finished almost four hundred pages of smut.”
“Listen, now that you’re getting your tonsils whacked from both ends, you’re not allowed to become a smut snob, okay? I need at least another almost four hundred pages to help me forget that I’m in fucking Greek God territory and my dildo is still the best and only I’ve had on this vacay.”
“I’m good with smut all day every day, you’re the plot police, not me.”
“Whatever,” Delilah gripes back. “Ah, also, I read this thing about how cum can alter your cooch PH levels, so make sure you cough and hose afterwards.”
“Seriously? That’s what you’re reading about on vacation? Vaginal PH levels?”
“Listen, you’re the one getting basted on the regular right now, asshole. Thank me!”
“Thank you…” I croon back, waving at Alfred when I walk past the front desk straight to the elevator. “But also, you need to go out and explore. Get out of the hotel and go do something that doesn’t involve baking in the sun all day, or bobbing on a yacht.”
I get in the instant the doors open, my pulse picking up when I press the button for mine and Auguste’s floor and I catch sight of Jayden’s jersey in the mirror.
This is why Auguste has been quiet all afternoon. Deathly silent.
Pissed.
Do I feel bad about it? Maybe a little.
Do I regret it? Not yet…
“I can’t leave my mom, Courtney,” Delilah says. “She’s still in a bad place after my uncle’s passing. ”
“Dee, your dad is there now, let him take care of her while you do something for you. Take a moment to fill your cup. Okay?”
“Yeah.”
“Dee…”
“I hear you and I’ll try.”
“I love you,” I tell her because something in my chest tells me she needs to hear it. She needs someone to love on her in some way. “And I miss you.”
“Oh man…” Delilah sighs. “I’m glad he’s under your skin. That man is good for you. He’s got you showing affection and?—”
“I always show affection.” I think.
“No, you use your snark and your sass to be cutesy, but affectionate is not how I would describe you. It’s not a bad thing… I guess affection is something we mirror. It’s an emotion, not a feeling so it’s not a natural trait that self-nurtures.”
“But I’m a good friend, right? I’m a good person to you?”
“What? Of course. Dude, you’re my ride or die. You’re one of the kindest people I know and you’re loyal. But your mom isn’t a nurturer and Martin’s a ballbag… your dad?—”
“He’s affectionate, I think. Tactile.” I don’t know what else to say, but it felt wrong to let her say something bad about him when I know it’s the opposite.
The doors ping open and I’m hit with instant awareness.
I feel Auguste before I see him. Pulling my keys from my purse, I suck in a breath grounding myself.
Let’s be honest, I knew he would feel some kind of way about the jersey. And just like in the bathroom at the facility, a thrill flutters in my belly when I look up and find him standing at my door. Ram-rod straight. Jaw clenched tight. Eyes a monotone kind of raged. A green monster unhinged shade.
“Hey, Dee… I have to go, but I’ll call you later. Okay?”
“Oh my God, yesss… go get it, hoe,” she yips, I can hear her clapping through the line. “Remember cough and hose.”
I end the call as I step out of the elevator.
The air is hot. Frenetic. So charged, I can’t breathe. I can’t speak. I can only walk to my door, my stare holding Auguste’s.
He says nothing. Not a fucking word.
The calm before the storm personified.
And my hands are shaking so much I can’t get the key in the lock for the life of me. Auguste’s hot breath is burning in my ear. Deep, raking breaths that are fuzzing everything around me.
Still he says nothing. The silence is killing me.
Ratcheting up all my sense into overload when I drop the key and he crouches behind me, that guttural inhale-exhale, inhale-exhale crawling down my body as he picks it up and then stands.
Fuck… no… he’s hulking over me. I’m trembling. My heart pounding into my ribs.
Then the door opens and I’m faced with nothing but darkness in front of me and prisoned by Auguste’s suddenly too, too big brawn.
Swallowing down the scorching lump throbbing in my chest I walk inside, following Auguste’s shadow looming over me straight to the kitchen.
Keys skitter onto the granite beside me at the same as a stoney fist yanks the hem of the jersey at my back.
There’s no prelude. No warning. Nothing that prepares me for the sudden jolt forward, pining me to the counter as his other hand pulls a sharp knife from the block on the counter.
It’s swift. Terrifying. The sound is… jarring and feral and it screams all the things he hasn’t said with the one savage tug through the fabric.
What the knife doesn’t tear, Auguste rips apart with his hands and yanks it off me.
Then he’s gone.
Gone.
I’m completely paralyzed. I can’t feel my legs as the acrid smell of burning smokes from behind me. Black and dangerous.
Pushing off the counter, I turn to be met with a raging fire in my sink and Auguste watching it with a snarl. The knife he used to cut the jersey off me is on the counter beside him, the box of matches is clutched too tightly in his hand.
When he turns to me, I’m rooted to the ground beneath my feet in spite of every purposeful step he takes in my direction.
A heavy hand grips the base of my skull dragging me the rest of the way to him. His thick fingers are knotted in my hair as he pulls me between him and the sink. My back to his front.
His body is hard and corded. Unlike anything I’ve ever felt.
Dangerous. His entire demeanor. Every sharp edge of his body. Each shredded breath.
“Auguste—”
“Watch,” he snaps, cutting me off and pushing my face closer to the fast dwindling fire and the blackened scraps left of the jersey. “Watch and heed the fucking warning, Courtney.”
Oh my God.
I attempt to shake him off, but his arm coils around my waist. His groin pins me to the edge of the sink. Hard and unforgiving—he’s getting off on reigning over me, and fuck…
No. No… no… no…
My body is seeking his out even as I bark at him, “You’re… you’re fucking crazy… deranged.”
“No, Princess… I have boundaries.” His lips are at my ear as each word cuts past his clenched teeth. “I don’t fucking share and I sure as fuck don’t play these weak-ass stupid games.”
I open my mouth to argue but his palm grips the bottom of my face, snapping it shut.
“Listen. That’s all you fucking do right now. Understand?” His hand tightens. “Nod.”
I do, banging the back of my head against his chest in frustration while the lower half of my body has other ideas and ruts into his.
Table of Contents
- Page 1
- Page 2
- Page 3
- Page 4
- Page 5
- Page 6
- Page 7
- Page 8
- Page 9
- Page 10
- Page 11
- Page 12
- Page 13
- Page 14
- Page 15
- Page 16
- Page 17
- Page 18
- Page 19
- Page 20
- Page 21
- Page 22
- Page 23
- Page 24
- Page 25
- Page 26
- Page 27
- Page 28
- Page 29
- Page 30
- Page 31
- Page 32
- Page 33
- Page 34
- Page 35
- Page 36
- Page 37
- Page 38
- Page 39
- Page 40
- Page 41
- Page 42
- Page 43
- Page 44
- Page 45
- Page 46
- Page 47
- Page 48
- Page 49 (Reading here)
- Page 50
- Page 51
- Page 52
- Page 53
- Page 54
- Page 55
- Page 56
- Page 57
- Page 58
- Page 59
- Page 60
- Page 61
- Page 62
- Page 63
- Page 64
- Page 65
- Page 66
- Page 67
- Page 68
- Page 69
- Page 70
- Page 71