Page 46
Laura hated sunrises, but I loved them now that we lived closer to work.
Every day, I’d drive home and pray I made it in time to sit outside on the deck and watch the sun rise over the water. Laura would groan and complain, claiming she’d rather be in bed than drinking coffee on the deck, but she never missed a morning, no matter how tired she was.
And I would look over at her scowling face as she wrapped a blanket around her growing belly and think, This is what love is .
Life as I knew it was everything I could have hoped for. It was everything I had ever wanted and everything I’d never known I wanted and all the wonderful things in between.
One cold morning, Laura noticed me smiling at her instead of watching the sun rise over the water’s frozen surface. She hunkered deeper into her robe and blanket and lifted her coffee cup to her mouth .
“Watch your stupid sun,” she muttered.
“Hey, don’t call my son stupid,” I teased, reaching out to lay a hand over her stomach.
“Oh, ha-ha,” she grumbled. “It is freezing out here.”
“Yeah, it is,” I admitted, clearing my throat and trying to rid myself of a persistent, nagging tickle.
“And still, you drag me out here.”
“Because I love being out here with you.”
“Well, since you love being out here so much, why don’t you go salt the front porch?” she asked, reaching out with a gloved hand to poke me in the ribs. “God, I don’t know how you can sit there in just a sweatshirt. You’re such a freak of nature.”
I grinned. “I might be a freak, but you love me anyway.”
“Uh-huh.” She glanced toward the lighthouse and began to stand. “Well, time to start my day and time for you to end yours.”
“Yeah, I’m fucking exhausted,” I said, needing to yawn suddenly.
It ended with a cough, and Laura groaned.
“God, sounds like you’re next to be hit with the affliction,” she muttered, throwing her head back with a groan.
The girls had been sick for the past week with a nasty cold that kept them home from school for four days straight.
Laura and I crossed our fingers every day that maybe we had both come away without catching their plague, and I was still holding on to hope, despite the seemingly sudden tickle in my throat .
“Nah, I’m probably just wiped out. I had to chase a homeless junkie out of the cemetery last night.”
Laura turned on her way to the back door, looking surprised. The cemetery saw little action, so when something did happen, it was exciting.
“Really?”
I nodded, standing to stretch my arms overhead with another yawn and a sniffle.
Oh no . “Yeah. He had snuck in to sleep in one of the mausoleums. I gave him the cash in my wallet to find somewhere warm and get something to eat,” I said before lowering my gaze to the snow-dusted railing around the deck. “He was wearing a Vietnam veteran hat.”
“Oh,” she replied softly.
“I mean, he probably took my money and went to buy some booze or something, but all I could think was, if you hadn’t found me …”
“We don’t think about that now,” she said, closing the gap between us and leaning her bundled-up body against mine. “I hope he found somewhere warm to go.”
“Me too,” I said, kissing the top of her head.
She stepped away, looked up into my eyes, and said, “Don’t forget to salt the porch.”
I yawned once more, then nodded. “I won’t.”
***
The military had left me with the ability of preparedness and foresight. I could often see the consequences of decisions before they were made, and because of this, I was always diligent and timely when it came to getting things done.
Laura said that was what made me such a great husband and father. I did things when I was asked to do them, and often, I did them before she even asked.
But that day, I went to bed, not feeling well.
By the time I lay down, I succumbed to the reality that it must’ve been my turn to be hit by Jane and Lizzie’s nasty cold.
I took out my hearing aids. Not something I often did, for the sake of preparedness, like I had said, but they needed batteries, and I needed sleep, so I told myself I’d change them when I woke up.
It was fine. Laura was at work. The girls were already at school, and their dad was picking them up afterward. Nobody would be home for at least seven hours, and I fell into what felt like the deepest sleep of my life.
When I cracked my eyes open, it was already growing dark outside. I cursed under my breath—I was going to be late for work—and winced at the pain in my throat.
It was hands down one of the most unpleasant parts of having kids. The amount of times I’d been sick over the past five years was mind-boggling, and I was beginning to consider homeschooling, if only for the fact that my stepdaughters would no longer exist as the human equivalent of a petri dish.
I rolled out of bed, annoyed by the throbbing behind my eyes. It was too late to call in sick. I’d have to tough it out for the night, but maybe tomorrow, I’d take the night to feel miserable .
I grabbed my hearing aids from the nightstand and was about to put them in when I remembered they needed batteries still. Fuck . I was definitely going to be late, and I wasn’t happy about it. It wasn’t like me to be late. I was punctual. I was reliable. But, shit, I felt terrible .
Maybe it’s not a cold. Maybe it’s the flu or something.
The world around me was silent as I walked through the house to the kitchen, where I kept the batteries in a junk drawer. It was probably better to keep them in the bedroom. I didn’t know why they hadn’t been put there in the first place, and I made a mental note to move them later.
But first batteries, then work.
I squinted toward the back window. In the distance, my lighthouse blinked through the darkened clouds.
What the hell time is it?
I glanced at the time on the microwave and sighed as I remembered we hadn’t set it yet …
nor had we put up the clock on the wall.
Jesus Christ, we needed to get our shit together, and it probably needed to happen before the baby got here.
But it was hard to do much of anything when everything needed to be done all at once.
Maybe we should’ve waited to move , I thought, pulling open the drawer that housed the batteries. No, we needed the space. We’re fine. We just need to make a list or something. Set priorities. It’ll all get done .
But first, I need to feel better . I groaned, scrubbing a hand across my aching face before setting back to work on my hearing aids .
She should be home , I thought, unscrewing the back of one and popping out the tiny-as-fuck battery.
I was rushing, my mind racing. I had to get to work. My eyes hurt; my sinuses throbbed. I had to throw my snacks and dinner together. I had to get dressed. No time for a shower. God, and my head was pounding , and where the hell was Laura?
Batteries changed, hearing aids in, I turned them on and raised the volume, listening to the sounds of the house as I went back to the bedroom for my phone, still connected to its charger.
The whir of the refrigerator. The wind coming off the water.
The crashing waves, beating against the pier. The creaking floorboards.
I pulled the phone from its charger and gasped.
Not only was it after eight o’clock at night— I slept twelve hours?!— but I had nearly a dozen missed calls and even more texts.
“Holy shit,” I muttered, scrolling through the calls.
Laura, Laura, Laura … then Brett, Brett, Brett, Lucy, Brett …
“Why the fuck would he be calling me?” I wondered out loud, shaking my head.
He and I had little love for each other.
He didn’t like me for unwittingly stealing the affection of his wife, and I didn’t like him for faulting me for something I’d had little control over.
It wasn’t as though I’d been in touch with Laura during that time.
It wasn’t like I had intentionally kept her from moving on.
But he held me responsible for that, and while I couldn’t say I agreed, I could put myself in his shoes and say I probably would’ve felt the same had our roles been reversed .
Didn’t you hate him for kissing her years ago? I considered the thought as I opened my unread text messages.
Laura: Hey, babe, just left work. Going to grab some Chinese before coming home. Anything special you want?
Laura: I guess I’ll just get your usual.
Laura: LOL, I’m willing to bet you’re out cold and don’t have your ears turned on. It’s okay. I’ll wake you up when I get there if you’re not awake by then.
Laura: Oh! And don’t forget, I have an appointment with the OB tonight.
Laura: Okay, on my way home with dinner. Totally gonna jump on your head if you’re not up. Be prepared.
Laura: Or maybe I’ll be nice and wake you up with my mouth on your dick. Hmm … decisions, decisions …
My heart began to thump loudly, rapidly picking up speed. Those texts had been sent over three hours ago. Three hours .
Maybe she let me sleep. She knew I wasn’t feeling well. Maybe there’s Chinese waiting for me in the fridge.
I left the bedroom, absentmindedly checking the rest of the texts, all from Brett and a few from my sister .
Lucy: I just got a call from Brett. He’s looking for you and Laura. I don’t know what freaky, kinky shit you guys are up to right now, but answer your phones.
Brett: Hey. I don’t know what the fuck is going on right now. I have tried calling you and Laura a thousand times. I have the girls. We have eaten dinner with my parents, and I’m supposed to drop them off at your place. Where the hell are you guys?
Lucy: Seriously, Max. What’s going on?
Brett: I would really appreciate an answer. Are you home?
Grace: Lucy just texted me. Where are you? Is everything okay?
Brett: I’m getting really pissed off here. Trying to keep the girls busy. They’re getting tired. WTF is going on?
Brett: Your sister told me Laura had an appointment tonight. Is everything okay? Please let me know. I’m serious. What’s going on?
Table of Contents
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