Page 19

ARSENI

I don’t look at Margot as she leaves.

My eyes stay trained on Nikita, my face blank. I don’t know if this is some sort of test or if he’s just gotten bored and decided to bring out the new toy. But I won’t chance it either way.

Once Oleg and Margot are out of the room, I step closer to the table, my hands clasped behind my back.

“It’s done.”

Nikita lifts his coffee cup while eyeing me with what looks like annoyance. It must be about Margot, and I want to ask what happened but know better.

“Any witnesses?”

He takes a drink after watching my head shake. When he sets the coffee down, he rolls his neck. “Good. I don’t ever want you to leave a witness again. Do you understand?”

“Yes sir… Is there a problem with the whore?”

He points to a newspaper lying in front of a chair crookedly pulled out. “Yeah. She’s atrociously boring and comes with baggage.”

I sit down in the chair, scooting it straight, and look over an article about Margot. The creases in my brow deepen the further I read.

“What the fuck?”

“Don’t get excited,” Nikita says, leaning back in his chair. “The cunt is innocent.”

I shake my head while skimming where it says the woman suspected of acquiring child pornography is evading the police. They don’t even think she’s been taken. They think she’s on the run.

That should be perfect for me. It should make me laugh. But humor never comes.

I turn to Nikita. “How do you know?”

He glares. She’s really put him in a foul mood. “How do you not know?”

I don’t answer him, but I vividly remember her begging me to return money to a ‘stalker.’ She freely claimed she was paying him off for information he had on her. When she wouldn’t tell me what it was, I grew disinterested. But if this is what she was hiding… Now I understand.

“I offered her sanctuary here, and she practically spit it back in my face,” Nikita says. “No one with this kind of deviant taste could resist that.”

“Resist what?” I ask, my voice oddly weak. “What were you going to do, provide her with the shit?”

Nikita raises a brow. “Did I just find your line?”

I rub a hand over my jaw and inhale a slow breath instead of answering.

I don’t know why I’m annoyed with him. I don’t even think he’s serious.

The guy gets off on tugging out every sliver of vulnerability he can from a person, so it shouldn’t surprise me that he’d take his chance with Margot. I’m not surprised. Just … annoyed.

I stand from the table, folding the newspaper under my arm. Before I can take a step, my phone goes off. I don’t have to look to know who it is. Luka gave himself a special ringer two years ago, which is just a series of porn star moans.

I strip my cell from my pocket and hit ignore while Nikita boils beside me.

“Who is it?” he asks, his voice deceptively calm.

“Fox. He found the guy who trashed my place.” I turn the phone on vibrate and slide it back into my pocket.

“ Again ?”

Again…?

Shit .

I close my eyes at the memory of telling him about Fox’s newly deceased enemy. It was brief, just an off-handed remark when Nikita asked yesterday. His tone was so bland, I knew he didn’t care. But he obviously remembered.

“Now you’re lying to me about Luka calling?”

I face him with a sigh. “I haven’t been answering.”

Don’t be so fucking paranoid .

“Uh huh.” Nikita lazily lifts a hand. “And I suppose you want me to just trust that?”

“Yes.”

“ How ?”

“The same way I trust you, boss,” I say with a heavy shrug. “You say shit, I believe it. I say shit, you believe it. That’s how these things work.”

Lowering his hand, he nods, but it isn’t in agreement. “You say a lot of things, Arseni.” He blows a breath through his nose and looks away. “How are we supposed to trust each other if we keep secrets like this?”

“It’s not a secret.” I shake my head. “I just didn’t want it to worsen your already bad mood.”

“Ah, you lie to protect me. Thank you, son.”

My teeth grind as I look up at the ceiling. I remember the first time he called me son. We were in the back of the Lincoln, Oleg taking a walk as Nikita ordered. He said he wanted only my ears, and at the time, that had me beaming with pride.

I listened to the job he wanted me to do, one he claimed too important for anyone else to fuck up. He spoke to me in a way no one in the Bratva ever had, not even Luka. He spoke to me like I was not only intelligent, but essential. He saw things in me I didn’t see, nobody had ever seen.

And when the moniker slipped off his tongue, his hand on my shoulder, I nodded sharply, obediently , but I am ashamed, humiliated to admit that I wanted to cry.

It doesn’t have the same effect now. Now it just sounds condescending.

“What do you want me to do?” I deadpan.

“I want you to be loyal,” Nikita says, his voice dropping like he’s wounded. But it’s fake. I don’t even look at him, and I know it’s fake.

“I am loyal.”

Seconds pass, enough that I get tired of staring at the ceiling and look at him instead.

His chin rests atop interlaced fingers. When he perks up, his palms flattening on the table, he sucks in air to speak.

“I want you to block his number… I trust you, but I don’t trust him.

He’ll never get the message if you keep leaving the door open for him like this. ”

Luka isn’t a heartbroken ex-girlfriend. He’s a fucking annoying gnat who won’t buzz off.

“Fine.” I pull out my phone and wag it. “I’ll block him.”

Murderous contempt pools in Nikita’s eyes, making his upper lip twitch like he wants to sneer. But it only lasts a moment. His lips pull into a small smile as he lowers his chin. “Thank you, son.”

I turn to leave, already unlocking my phone to go to Luka’s contact, but Nikita isn’t quite finished.

“Have the whore ready by tomorrow evening… I’m throwing a party in her honor. And yours, too.”

My shoulders bunch, my steps faltering.

Yes sir .

That’s what I should say. It should slip off my tongue as easily as it has a thousand times before, but this time, my vocal cords are pulled too tight with some fiery force. I’m walking away before I realize it’s jealousy.

I leave without another word, even as protest stacks on my tongue. I couldn’t voice it even if I wanted to, even if I was currently capable. Any protest would only make me fail the inevitable test he’s giving me. I knew it would come. I knew it before Margot arrived.

Just don’t get attached .

When he spoke those words, I shrugged them away. I welcomed his tests, knowing I would come out favorable.

Don’t get attached? I’ve had more siblings than I’ve had friends. I’ve broken more friendships than I have hearts. I’ve fucked more women than all of the above.

I lost the only person I ever believed was family.

I have no attachment to anyone or anything. I could pack a trash bag full of shit tonight and live the same life in another city without a moment of discomfort.

All of this is true. And still, I feel uneasy heading for the basement. Like I’m somehow going to fail this test I’ve studied my whole goddamn life for.

I pull up Luka’s contact when I make it to the basement door and hit block. When my phone asks if I’m sure, I hover my thumb above the confirmation.

My eyes closing, I click cancel and shove my phone back in my pocket.