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“I am taking this boy upstairs before he wakes up and is scarred for life,” Monica said, moving toward her sleeping child. “Then you can have as much sex talk as you please, Rose.”

“Thank God.” She bounced on the couch, grinning. “I want to hear about girth.”

Monica groaned trying to pull Colin out of his prone sleeping position on the floor without waking him up. He grumbled something, but she managed to lift him. He was tall but all gangly limbs instead of heavy bulk.

Monica managed to carry him up the stairs and into one of the extra bedrooms. She laid him down on the bed and pulled the covers over his shoulders. Part of her was tempted to stay here with him. Keep an eye on him. She didn’t want him to feel like he was alone.

But there was another part of her, probably the part aided by a glass or two of wine, that wanted to hear about girth.

When she returned to the living room, Becca was laughing so hard she had tears streaming down her cheeks. Her face was fire-engine red and Rose looked pleased as punch.

“If you don’t fill me in because I took my son to bed, I’m excommunicating you both from my friendship.”

Monica plopped herself down on the empty cushion of the couch, picking up the glass of wine she’d been sipping on earlier. She might regret a few more glasses, but it would be fun and something she hadn’t done in forever. It wasn’t irresponsible to get a little tipsy because Rose was here and sober, and could handle any problems that cropped up.

Monica deserved a tiny bit of fun for once, a little girl time. She hadn’t had that in… Well, she’d never had drunk, talk-about-actual-sex girl time. She’d gotten married at nineteen, had her son at twenty, and spent the past ten years raising him and building her career.

“Rose has decided…” Becca dissolved into another fit of giggles. “How… Well…” Becca made awkward hand gestures as she laughed.

“What?” Monica demanded.

“I was just saying that I’ve determined the size of our three fine Navy SEALs by, you know, months of dedicated research.”

“Does Jack know you’ve been researching the size of the other two?” Monica asked, happily amused both by Rose’s conversation and Becca’s scandalized laughing.

Rose waved her away. “Oh, I’m talking about before Jack and I got together. When those boys first walked into my bar all Navy SEAL sure of themselves with just a hint of an edge to make them interesting, let’s just say I scoped out the landscape.”

“So who wins?”

Rose smiled slyly at Becca. “Depends on what you’re looking for. Length. Girth. Stamina.”

“You cannot judge stamina by looking!” Monica said, giving her a light slap across the arm.

“Ican. It’s like a sixth sense.”

“A penile sixth sense. Maybe you’re the eighth wonder of the world.”

“Now, it isn’t fair to shareallI’ve surmised considering I’m sleeping with one, and you’re sleeping with the other,” Rose said, nodding toward Becca. That all-too-satisfied look slid to Monica. “And technically I can’t prove my theories until someone takes a gander at Gabewithoutclothes.”

“I nominate Monica.”

Monica glared at Becca. “You need to stop obsessing about me getting into Gabe’s pants.”

“It’s not so much an obsession asmysixth sense. I think you and Gabe complement each other. Besides, Rose and I are taken. You’re all that’s left.”

“Well, I only believe in penile sixth senses, so your complementary sixth sense can bite me.”

Both Rose and Becca dissolved into fits of giggles, and Monica couldn’t help but follow. The discussion then ranged from Rose’s sex talk, to Revival, to first times. The more Monica drank, the more she felt a little bit like crying at how nice this all was.

When a thump sounded loud somewhere out by the porch, Monica frowned. Her first thought was Colin had woken up, but it wasn’t right above them, like it should have been for that.

“Oh no,” Becca said, looking at where the thumping had come from.

“What? What is it?” Rose asked, wide eyed.

“Ron Swanson’s on the roof.”

Monica groaned. “Not the goat. Please, not the goat.”